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Life

The Liberation of Letting Go

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Montclair chapter.

If you asked me a couple years ago what I associated “letting go” with, I wouldn’t have used “liberating.” I would’ve asked you why you were asking me that question and what I had to let go. Fear would’ve struck me and I would’ve questioned every motive behind the question.

You could’ve been sincere and asked it out of curiosity, but it would’ve lingered in my mind incessantly: “Was that a hint? Does that mean that I am holding onto something that I’m not supposed to? What if I don’t want to let go? Obviously, I’m holding onto it for a reason. It must have a purpose.”

All of this over-thinking, over-analyzing, would’ve occurred because of one simple question. It wouldn’t have been simple then but it is incredibly simple now. It’s simple because I made it simple. I manifested it. Life has a way of throwing things in your face when you don’t listen or see a sign the first time.

I’m not asking you to let go of that toy you slept with every night until you were five. I am asking you to let go of that moment, that thought, that still leaves you stagnant in time. It leaves you speechless, frozen, and cold. Most of all, it leaves you powerless. I know that feeling and it had a hold on me for longer than I wanted. But, it was necessary. It was necessary because I wouldn’t be standing here today speaking my truth. You see, how I let go will be different from how you let go but that doesn’t mean that it has to be any easier or harder. As long as you are willing and able, with time and patience, your heart won’t feel so heavy.

Breathe. You can call this your first step but it needs to be incorporated in all steps and all things you do. We all have our episodes, however big or small, and it’s important that we take the time to pause and reflect, close our eyes, inhale, and exhale. Despite how simple this may seem, it’s something we often take for granted and don’t take the time to acknowledge. There is power in breathing because there is power in clearing your mind, opening your lungs, and allowing air to pass through your body and completely wash over you.

Allow that air to fill you and while you’re at it, let any other emotion come in as well. We often hear “don’t think that, don’t feel that.” I’m here to tell you that unless that person has discovered someway to enter your body, they have no say or right to tell you how or why you have the emotions that you do. You’re angry? Let that in. You’re devastated? Let that in. You feel defeated? Let that in too.

None of these feelings can be confronted if you are constantly putting them at bay or rejecting them. Sooner or later, that wall that you built will come crumbling down and all you will have left is emotional turbulence and overwhelming confusion. You have to let your mind as well as your body know that it’s natural to not feel ok sometimes. Once you allow them there, you can begin to unravel them and find the root of them.

Finding that root means that you’re addressing them and addressing them gives yourself options. You give yourself the choice to let them sit and fester or confront them head on with full force. I’m not saying that this needs to be a vigilant effort where you’re scolding yourself in the mirror each day. I’m not even saying that you won’t fall prey to them sometimes because we all have our good days and we all have our bad days.

You have to get into a routine of allowing those feelings to come in but also give them a door to go out. This can be through meditation, or simple affirmations. But any method that it is done through, it is all up to you. There is no right or wrong way and you have to guide your mind and body to where you want it to live peacefully. It’s there, but do I want it to be there? It’s there, but do I want it to get comfortable? Answering those questions is the first step to letting go and everything else follows. You can walk lighter and breathe deeper because you finally greeted your feelings and let them pass on without so much as a glance back.

That liberation has always been within you, you just have to give it permission to reside here.

Yazmenne Archer

Montclair '21

Yaz is a senior majoring in Communication and Media Arts with a minor in Creative Writing. She has a strong passion for storytelling and inviting readers with a conversational style. She believes that everyone’s story should be heard and continues to write pieces that promote self discovery and wellbeing. Though she specializes in writing pieces, she also dabbles in genres of poetry and fiction.
Emma Flusk

Montclair '19

Emma Flusk is recent graduate from Montclair State University, where she majored in Television and Digital Media. She was the Editor-in-Chief and a Campus Correspondent at Her Campus Montclair. She’s passionate about anything that has to do with lifestyle, beauty and wellness for women. She is a self-proclaimed craft queen, semi-pro binge-watcher and a lover of all dogs.