Everyone has that “oh shit” moment when they take that first step onto the campus where they will spend the next four years of their life.
Whether you are a commuter or you’re living miles from home, college is for adults and there’s no recess or snack swaps to help you make friends anymore – and that’s one thing I was most concerned about. Being a transfer student on top of all of that, I found the transition uncomfortable to say the least. Even though I live a short drive away now, I was still dipping my toes in to a much deeper pond this time around. After having a bad hazing experience at a big rowdy school where Greek life was everything, I was unsure about how I would feel about pledging at Montclair State University. I went from a bunch of “Regina George’s” to being completely in the dark with yet another pledge process.
I had heard all the alarming stories (and even lived a few of them) beforehand about being forced to drink anything and everything you didn’t want to, and even the classic story about the laundry machine (I’ll spare the details). I found myself questioning why I was going to put myself through that again. Yet as the recruitment flyers and sign up sheets were flying around campus, I had a different vibe and I figured why not give sorority recruitment a second chance.
I vividly remember the first night of pledging, where we were told calmly by our recruitment chair (the girl elected by the sorority to be in charge of our pledging process) that our priorities from then on were to be strictly family, academics, and finally pledging. I remember breathing in a sigh of relief at that moment, thinking, this time around it is going to be worth it . . . and it was.
Of course, we had our fair share of tough commitments. Not only were our plates now full with tons of new mandatory sisterhood events, but we’d also have to sit for hours on end to complete our library hours to get “homework done,” (but let’s be honest if you put a couple of dozen girls in a small space, nothing productive will come of it). And while I won’t be able forget all of the paper cuts I got from the excessive amount of sorority crafting, not once did I think twice about my decision to join.
If there were tears, they were tears of happiness; no one needed to treat me like dirt to make me want to be a part of their “clique.” In a pledge class of 51 girls, of course we ran in to our issues, but we settled them like real adults. We coordinated our OWN meetings to discuss issues and differences. I can honestly say that even though we weren’t hazed like the stereotypical sorority, it not only made us stronger but we respected one in another and, as a result, were able to grow as a group. Of course girls will go at it here and there, but we were never at such a low or depressed point during our process to ever truly lash out on one another.
A lot of people have this distorted idea that being hazed is what makes your experience richer and helps you grow with your pledge group, but I disagree. I have met some of my best friends in this organization and have already been able to network with so many people. I believe that that is what a true sisterhood is about and I am beyond proud to be a part of it.