Earlier this week, I was quickly scrolling through Facebook before diving into a homework sesh when a particle article caught my eye. The Huffington Post shared an article titled “Demi Lovato’s Reason For Refusing To Talk About Her Sexuality Is Total Bullshit.” I was confused as to why someone not talking about a personal aspect in their life was bullshit, so I clicked on the article.
There have been rumors about Demi Lovato dating a woman this past month. I’ve seen various photos of the popstar with her alleged girlfriend but brushed them off because her sexuality doesn’t matter to me. Since Demi has neither confirmed nor denied these rumors, the media is pressuring her for answers so they can score the next big headline.
Wondering why her response to the media was bullshit, I proceeded to read the article by Noah Michelson. According to this article, Demi Lovato had an interview with PrideSource.com, where she was given the opportunity to speak out about her sexuality: to which she responded, “Thank you for the opportunity, but I think I’m gonna pass.” When asked why, Lovato explained that the media just wants headlines and that her relationship is her private life.
The author of this article goes on to say, “As someone who’s never had to endure the kind of scrutiny or judgment celebrities do, I can only begin to imagine how daunting it must be to have strangers constantly scrounging for whatever juicy personal tidbits they can dig up or coerce you to cough up.” As a total contradiction to what he just wrote, Michelson proceeds to say “but, still, I am respectfully going to call bullshit on Lovato’s answer.”
The authors reason for “calling bullshit” is that “she’s talked about relationships in the past” and that “she’s open about other parts of her life so she should be open about this aspect.” This article essentially says that because Lovato has talked about relationships and sex in past songs, she is obligated to talk about her current romantic life. Although her relationships might influence her music, they can still remain private.
To argue that a celebrity has to share every aspect of their life is the real bullshit here. Demi Lovato has been extremely strong and open when sharing her struggles with her mental health and eating disorder, but that does not mean she needs to openly talk about her sexuality. Lovato is a proud ally to the LGBT community, regardless if she is a member of it or not. Many people struggle with sexual identity, and to force someone to be open about it can put a lot of pressure on the person.
Sexuality is not black and white. There is no reason why one should be forced into a category. If Demi doesn’t want to define her sexuality, then we shouldn’t care. The author of this article believes that Demi’s opposition to categorizing herself is “demonizing.” Michelson goes on to say that Demi’s refusal to say if she’s queer goes against the fight for LGBTQ rights. Demi has been to multiple pride festivals and even filmed her “Really Don’t Care” at the LA Pride Parade.
The most shocking part of this article was not the article itself, but the fact that it was shared by The Huffington Post’s women section. Female sites should be promoting lifting women up, not putting them down. Regardless of a position on a topic, we should never be forced to share information we aren’t comfortable with.
Because many people feel as though they don’t fall into one “category” of sexuality, Demi choosing not to label herself may actually help people realize that they don’t need to either. We can be proud allies to the queer community without defining ourselves as queer. Ultimately, it’s our actions that matter — not our labels.