When I was younger, I didn’t understand my father’s love. My dad’s love wasn’t about grand gestures or long talks. He didn’t need those things. His love showed up in the small things—how he cared for our family without fanfare and made sacrifices nobody saw. Now that I’ve grown older and left for college, I see all that he gave up to keep us safe and sound. My dad doesn’t talk much. He seldom mentions his exhaustion or stress. He never discusses the wrinkles on his face or the weariness in his eyes, but I’ve learned to notice them when I really look at him. He stands as our family’s pillar—the one who ensures the bills get paid, takes work calls late at night, and juggles the responsibilities of supporting my mom, grandparents, and me. I used to think everything came easily to him. But now, after observing his hard work and sacrifices, I now understand it’s not as easy as he made it seem.
I can picture those early mornings when my dad left for work in the dark. By the time I woke up, he had already left for the office, putting in long hours to provide for us and ensure we had what we needed. I also think back to the late nights when he came home exhausted, but still asked about my day, listened to my stories, and offered his quiet, thoughtful advice. He didn’t have to do that. Even though he was tired, he always made time for me and the rest of the family. To him, something mattered more than getting rest.
There was a time when I asked him why he worked so much. I asked him why he worked so much—why he didn’t take more time for himself, why he never took that vacation he always dreamed of, why he never seemed to prioritize his own needs. He gave me a straightforward answer, one that has lingered with me for years: “Because you’re my priority. You and your mother, and your grandparents. If I stop working, who will take care of everyone?” At the time, I hadn’t fully appreciated the weight of what he said.
But as I step out into adulthood now, away from home, I realize that he carried the entire family on his shoulders—without complaint, in silence. And as I move off to college, I keep seeing more and more just how much he gave up. He didn’t have the privilege of following his own dreams or aspirations. Everything he did was for us. For me. For my future. For my education. I’ve always known my dad loved me, but now I realize the price of that love. He took all the late hours, sacrificed all the family vacations, and all the time when I had to make a choice between taking care of myself and taking care of us. He sacrificed so much for me to have more.
He sacrificed his happiness, his dreams, and his peace of mind to ensure I had the opportunity to attend college, with all the benefits he himself was denied. And still, despite the sweat and hard work, despite the sacrifices he made, the burden he shouldered alone, he never made me see him cry. Never once complained. He didn’t want us to worry about him. I sometimes wonder if he even realized how much he was giving up, how much of himself he was setting aside.
It’s almost as though he thought that was just the job of being a father — to give and give and never expect something back. But there is one thing that always made all of his sacrifices pay off, something that I didn’t realize till I went away. It’s the way he lights up when I come back home from school during my semester breaks. Those few weeks, those short yet sweet moments when I get to come back to the house, to see him, to hear his voice, and to be with the family again—those are the moments that make everything seem okay again. For him, it’s like nothing else in the world matters.
All the worry, the late nights, the money problems, the fatigue of working—all of it dissolves when he sees me step through the front door. I’ve observed him closely as I arrive home, and it’s as if he forgets all about everything for a time. He’s my dad—the quiet, powerful man who has always stood by me—but there is a gentleness to him when I’m home. He’s still carrying all of the burdens of life, but somehow, in those moments when we’re together, the weight doesn’t seem as heavy for him. Maybe it’s because he knows that all of his hard work, all of his sacrifices, are not for nothing. Perhaps that’s because at those moments he knows I am fine, that I am doing what he had wanted for me, that I’m actually living his very dream for me.
And somehow that makes all the sacrifice worthwhile. It’s at those moments I finally understand my dad for what he is really like—not only the protector, not only the provider, but the one who loves with all his being, the one who would do anything for those he cares for.
He will never say it, but I see it in the softening of his eyes when he catches sight of me, in the leaning in when he listens to all that I have to say, in the holding on with every second I spend with him.
Despite all his sacrifices and long hours of work and worry, there is one thing he never forgets: how to love. His love is relentless, unyielding, and, above all, it is selfless. He doesn’t demand recognition. He doesn’t crave praise. He simply needs to know that I’m content, that I’m safe, and that I’m doing something I love. And that’s all he needs. As I grow older, I recognize more and more just how much my dad has given me. How much he has given to this family. I realize that the love he gave wasn’t just in the big moments but in the quiet, everyday acts—in the late nights working, in the early mornings spent getting ready for work, in the advice he gave me without me even asking for it.
It’s in all the little things he did and continues to do, quietly and without complaint. My father’s sacrifices are no longer something I take for granted. I realize that each day, he bears a burden—one that I will never be able to comprehend. But I also realize that he does it because he loves me. And in those times when he smiles at me, when he inquires about my day, and when he hugs me goodnight, I know that it was all worth it.
Because of him, I have a life full of opportunities, full of dreams, and full of love.
To my father: I see you. I see all your sacrifices, all your love, and all your unspoken strength. Thank you for everything. I will never not love you.