During fall break, I had a week off from school and decided I wanted to retake this trip I did with my parents almost ten years ago. All my friends had already made plans or did not want to spend money and save for the holidays. So I thought, “I’m an adult (at least legally), I want to travel, why not do it by myself? “
A lot of girls might think, “Oh, but I’m going to be lonely or it will be dangerous.” Honestly, it was quite liberating. Of course there are some things which are a little different when you’re alone (especially as a woman), but putting on a scale the positives and negatives, what you gain waaaay outweighs the inconveniences.
For starters my first day in New York, I had a feeling I had never experienced before. I don’t even know how to quite explain it but it was a mix of accomplishment, independence and self sufficiency. I made it. A year ago, living in Brazil with my parents, never in a million years would I have imagined that one day I would be in NYC by myself. Being completely honest the day before my trip I was a little nervous and my stomach was in knots, thinking about being all by myself in a place I knew nothing and no one. But I promise the feeling of discovering new things and doing it by yourself is amazing and there is nothing quite like it.
Second, freedom. As a Sagittarius, I’m a little biased on this topic, but I think everyone needs some freedom and visiting new places is a great way to achieve that. Almost all trips you take whether it’s with friends, family, or significant others, you will most likely have to compromise at some point. It’s humanly impossible to agree on every single detail, what to visit, what time to leave, where to eat, walk or take an uber, go out at night or stay in. Well here’s the best part of being by yourself: you do whatever you feel like doing. You depend solely on yourself to make all the decisions. You want to go somewhere you go, you’re tired and want to go back, you do. You wanna skip lunch and just eat a pastry, you do it (definitely recommend this one). You have you and only you to satisfy.
And speaking of this I have a piece of advice: organize beforehand. Just like any other trip, it takes time to see what you want to do and where you want to go and prepare an itinerary, it truly makes a difference. But of course, as you go you can make changes and adapt, one of the perks of being by yourself.
And this brings me to my third point: we undeniably will have to go through our entire lives with ourselves and we can’t escape that, so we should learn how to enjoy, to the fullest, our own company and have fun! I’ve always enjoyed some alone time but traveling by myself has helped me learn more about who I am in an extraordinary way because I had so much time to just be in my head, and think and reflect. I guess I have grown emotionally more in this one-week trip than in the entire last year. So grab your next opportunity to learn about you and what you love by traveling solo, I guarantee it will be a real eye-opener.
I’ve been talking as if there were no drawbacks and if this experience will only bring good things. Of course not, just like everything else in life it has two sides. You might go through some embarrassing moments. Let me tell you one – I rented one of those citi bikes to drive around Central Park. The first minute I was on the bike a woman almost crashed into me. I didn’t lock the seat well and as I hopped on it, it just sank with me on it and I lost control of the bike. But, after that it was all good and now I have a funny story to tell. Those things that seem embarrassing at the time become silly and funny after a while.
Also I have to mention the safety aspect. As a woman you obviously are more careful when being by yourself. But this is, unfortunately, everywhere. It’s not just because you’re in a new place that this is a new problem. Also, you can literally find anything on the internet, so take the time to research about how safe the place you want to go is, what neighborhoods to avoid and so on. The most important part is being aware of your surroundings and being reasonable, I didn’t go out at 2am in New York for example and once it was dark I was back in my hotel.
Looking back, being by myself helped me experience the city so much better. I’ve never been the best at locating myself and reading maps, but I had no other option but to do it. And this was enriching because I had to pay a lot more attention to the street names and places I used as reference points so I absorbed many more details when sightseeing. Also, being on your own minimizes distractions, so I was much more aware of my surroundings. Finally, you can blend in and feel like a local, which I love doing. It allowed me to more deeply explore the places I visited. By the end of my second day in NY, I was crossing the streets as soon as the car’s traffic light was red even if the white silhouette light wasn’t on yet – perhaps the New York way of life started to be ingrained in me.
Well, I am already dreaming about my next solo trip. How about you?