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Things Not to Say to a Biracial/Multi-Ethnic Individual

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Notre Dame chapter.

You may have heard American culture and its citizens being described as a “Melting Pot”, or “Tossed Salad”.  These terms are used to describe the amalgamation of immigrants that our nation has welcomed for centuries from all across the globe.  People have wanted to come to America from every part of the planet in pursuit of happiness, opportunity, freedom, safety, and a better life.  Due to the beautiful and incredible diversity that exists in the US, it is not surprising that 6.9% of the population identifies as being multiracial, according to the Pew Research Center.  However, in our everyday lives, it seems as though the American public does not know how to correctly approach some very valid questions regarding our heritage and ancestry.  Here are four commonly asked questions of multiracial/multi-ethnicity individuals. 

Why do you only look    [race]   ?

This question is so not okay because it forces people to choose who we are based on their appearances.  It also relegates someone’s personal identity to the color of their skin, and other physical genetic traits that they were not able to choose.  This question is just plain offensive.   

Are your parents still together?

In 2010, the United States Census demonstrated that 8.4% of married couples in the United States identified as being interracial.  Interracial unions can be susceptible to a higher amount of scrutiny because of the racism and bigotry that still exists in the United States, and that pressure may make it more difficult for a couple.  However, all couples face external pressures that make a marriage difficult at times.  Don’t just assume someone’s parents aren’t together because their parents aren’t the same race or ethnicity.  That’s just ignorant. 

So, which side do you identify with?

It really depends!  Sometimes, we practice more of one of our cultures, practice both equally, or practice none.  Just because we are multiracial or have multiple ethnicities does not mean that we have to pick to identify with one side over the other!  The way we choose to perform our races and ethnicities aren’t binary, and it really is open to how we as the individual choose to portray ourselves!  It’s actually a fluid combination of all of them, and we sometimes perform one more strongly than the other.  We can’t just choose one or the other.

Do you speak              language then?

Some multi-racial individuals speak just one language, and others speak multiple, and some speak languages that aren’t necessarily native to any of the languages associated with their race/ethnicity.    

 

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