For all of you Gossip Girl fans, do you remember the famous threesome between Dan, Vanessa and Olivia? If you don’t or haven’t watched Gossip Girl yet, Dan was in a relationship with Olivia and they had a threesome with Vanessa. It was all fun and games until the next day when Olivia felt like Vanessa and Dan had more fun together, resulting in their break-up. A ménage à trois is one of the most common fantasies between men and women, but it can lead to a total disaster if you and your SO don’t talk about the following:
-
How comfortable you are with the idea? If you go through with it just because it excites your significant other and you want to make them happy, please don’t do it. You know what you’re comfortable with and pressure would just make this more uncomfortable than it already is. You need to talk this through together and be sure that it is something that you are both into.
-
Kissing. If you don’t feel comfortable with the idea of your man kissing another woman or your man isn’t comfortable with the idea of you kissing another man this needs to be discussed. There are other ways to start a threesome than simply a three-way kiss; cuddling each other is another option. However, remember that you all should be comfortable and respectful of any kissing rules.
-
If the third person would be a close friend or not. Imagine having a threesome with a close friend of yours and then having to see them almost every day re-imagining that night. Now imagine seeing your SO with the third person talking together, and vice versa. Wouldn’t that spark any jealousy? If you or your SO aren’t the type to be jealous then go ahead, but you need to be a 100% sure!
-
Discretion. Discretion is a big question. If you do not want to be known for going around having threesomes then you should have a talk with your SO and the third person (especially if they’re a close friend) to keep the whole night to themselves.
-
Is the ideal third person for you both? Imagine that your SO picks someone he thinks is extremely attractive but you’re not attracted to her or you don’t feel comfortable around her. This threesome would be the worst thing to happen to you. I personally think that if the third person will be a girl then you should choose who she is. This way you will not only be attracted to her, but feel comfortable too.
-
Sanity. The third person you pick must be one that would not interfere in any way in your relationship after the threesome or try to cause conflicts; be careful who you invite in your bed.
-
Boundaries. You all need to talk about what your boundaries are, how far you want to go with each other and whether you or your SO will interact with him/her. You also need to talk with your SO beforehand about whether the third person will stay the night.
-
Downloading an app. There are apps like Feeld (previously called 3nder) that can be used to connect people looking for threesomes. It would be a good idea to download it and get talking to the third person so you can feel more comfortable when you get to meet them.
-
How to remove any awkwardness. You must remember that at the beginning there will be awkwardness, however this will likely fade away by talking and getting to know each other and then trying a three-way kiss.
-
Staying safe. Be sure that the third person does not have any STDs and always use a condom!
Edited by Jess Shelton
Sources:
http://38.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lfyg9rnHF61qee97to1_500.jpg
http://noiportal.hu/images/kepgaleriak/nagyok/1_24483.jpg
https://media.giphy.com/media/idSnyh1gs1kly/giphy.gif
https://68.media.tumblr.com/dc0c51e9987d454e47eac06b09ea7532/tumblr_ntr8…