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The Perks of Being the Perpetually Single Friend

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Nottingham chapter.

The ongoing debate on love, relationships and the associated drama has been consuming our time for too way long. The emergence of ludicrous ‘relationship goals’ on social media and the exaggerated spectacle into the lives of others online paints the delusional picture that happiness and being with ‘the one’ are mutually exclusive, leaving young people today more fickle in terms of relationships and issues of the heart.

Having never been in a long-term relationship, I can’t help but feel perplexed around what all the fuss is about. I myself am an example of the single friend with a cynical outlook on the ideals of relationships. No, that doesn’t mean I’m bitter and haven’t given it a go. Admittedly, my experiences of the male species thus far have been far from ideal, having been in the awkward limbo ‘dating’ stage one too many times. I am, quite frankly, tired of the neat categories and obscured images associated with relationships. The times of my life that have been the happiest and most fulfilled are the times without the involvement of another guy in my life, so why should I start any time soon?

The many blessings of being in a good relationship may overshadow by the single life; always having company, someone to care for, self-esteem, intimacy, experimentation and security. But all of these things can be achieved with what Whitney Houston would deem the Greatest Love of All – self-appreciation! Here are a few of the many perks of not falling into a relationship:

1. Autonomy

University is the time to focus on yourself. This isn’t being selfish, it is simply investing in the person that you will spend your whole life with. Without the time restrictions that come with a relationship, you can be selfish without feeling any guilt. We live in a life brimming with narratives: personally, my story has unfolded through self-determination and I have always been happier without the restrictions of stifling relationships.2. Your friendships flourish

The traditional language of love suggests that self-discovery and definition can only be fulfilled within a relationship. Don’t buy this Disney myth! This point in your life is a prime time for the formation of life-long friendships, so take away the aim of being somebody else’s someone, and grow by welcoming new friendships whole-heartedly.3. Valentine’s Day fun

This may sound obscene or even cold-hearted, but having never had a boyfriend for special occasions such as Valentine’s Day, the day has always had a celebratory spin and become a prime opportunity for a girl’s night. For those who have been in a relationship, the fear of missing out causes the bandwagon to be jumped upon. The premise of the empty, patronising comments about taunting loved-up friends is simply to be overlooked. Having never had a real relationship, I can assure you that single or not, having to celebrate can be equally as fun.4. No drama

We all know this one. As cute and casual as the parlance of love may seem, the argot is stiflingly conservative. Love should be about freedom, but it’s often more hassle than it’s worth. In a world that values being somebody’s somebody, rather than a somebody, you are free from the drama and the labels.

Edited by Tia Ralhan

Sources:

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/commentisfree/2016/feb/14/this-is-the-real-reason-youre-single-on-valentines-day

http://www.theguardian.com/media/mind-your-language/2016/feb/14/single-write-out-a-thousand-times-you-are-a-whole-person

Image sources:

http://theodysseyonline.com/arcadia/7-reasons-why-its-important-to-have-girls-night-in/217490

https://www.tumblr.com/search/serena%20and%20blair%20gif

http://glee.wikia.com/wiki/File:Nodrama.gif

http://www.empoweringwomennow.com/9-signs-youre-a-strong-woman-who-knows-what-she-wants/

https://insideherprettylittlehead13.wordpress.com/2012/02/18/being-singl…

First year International Media and Communications student at the University of Nottingham and Features writer for Her Campus! 
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Naomi Upton

Nottingham

Naomi is a third year English student at Nottingham University and Co-Editor in Chief of HC Nottingham. Naomi would love a career in journalism or marketing but for now she spends her time beauty blogging, attempting to master the delicate art of Pinterest, being an all-black-outfit aficionado, wasting time on Buzzfeed, going places, taking pictures and staying groovy.