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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

What Do We Need For A Relationship To Last?

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Nottingham chapter.
  • ‘We are so in love! We are going to be together forever since we love each other so much’
  • ‘But you guys have so many problems…’
  • ‘Doesn’t matter, all we need is love <3’

Sorry to break it to you but that is wrong… Yes, love is one of the fundamentals for the relationship to begin and to be maintained, because if you do not love each other then why stay together? However, love is not the only thing required for a relationship to last, there are other equally important things that you have to keep in mind.

1. Love:

Of course, you need to express your love to your S.O, say ‘I love you’ and actually mean it –do not fool them-, and also hugs, kisses, cuddles are extremely important for you and your S.O to feel close to one another. All these don’t have to be in public, every couple is different so do them whenever you feel comfortable.

2. Trust:

Trust is one of the most important things. You cannot be in a relationship where trust is not established. The one who does not trust his/her S.O would most likely also feel insecure about their relationship. If you feel insecure and do not trust your S.O then you are in an unhealthy and unstable relationship which could be on the verge of breaking down every time your partner goes out without you.

 

3. Respect and Compromise:

Respect the other person, their beliefs and ideas and you should find a compromise between them and yours.

4. Happiness and Positivity:

The happy moments should outweigh the unhappy ones, and you guys should receive more positive experiences through your relationship than negative ones. If most of them are negative how is your relationship even healthy enough to last?

 

5. Communication and Honesty:

You need to be able to express all your feelings, needs and expectations with full honesty and also need to be honest with your partner on any problems or thoughts you have.

 

6. Loyalty:

This one’s pretty self-explanatory…

 

7. Interdependence:

You should never put aside your own identity for ANYONE. Don’t be afraid to speak your mind. Be you but also don’t try to change the person you are with, LET THEM BE THEM. If you are in a relationship with them in the first place, then you must have liked the person they were so why even try to change them later?

 

8. Support and Encouragement and Learn:

You must be supportive of your loved one and encourage them to be their best person possible and achieve whatever goals they set and you also should be willing to learn from each other’s mistakes, mishaps, highs and lows.

 

9. Privacy:

When a partner shares and confides in you, you should not release any information without their permission. They confided in you because they trust you, if they knew that you would share their secrets to your best friends, mother, sister, brother etc. they would not have come to you in the first place which would be trait of an unhealthy relationship. If a relationship is to last one should be able to confide to the other confidently.

 

10. Romance or Ordinariness:

Romance is not dead and is essential to keep the relationship going. At least once in a while light some candles, prepare a bubble bath, go to romantic dinners or make one yourself or even watch the sunset or sunshine together. Both of you should also be comfortable with the ordinariness that a long-term relationship brings: the usual make lunch or dinner together, the usual just sit on the couch and do nothing, the usual hangouts in that same café. Embrace that ordinariness because all the things you share, the day-to-day times you spend together that seem to ordinary are quite extraordinary because that is something you do not share with anyone else.

 

Sources:

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Vicky P

Nottingham