We’ve seen it time and time again: Olivia Rodrigo versus Sabrina Carpenter. Selena Gomez versus Hailey Bieber. Jennifer Anniston vs Angelina Jolie. Time after time, the media pit women against each other, igniting public debates where one woman is hailed as a hero, while the other is publicly crucified. Most recently, this trend has surfaced in the viral “Halley versus Sophia La Corte” feud on TikTok, drawing audiences into the same familiar cycle. The trending sound “I hate that ginger bitch” echoing the feuds of women globally. But why do we do this? Why do we feel the need to pit women against women?
Every few months, a new drama emerges, launching two women into the arena of spotlight. Often, the focus isn’t on their accomplishments or talents, but rather on a manufactured battle of who’s right and who’s wrong. And at the heart of many of these conflicts? A man. Personal grudges or social situations involving romantic interests seem to drive these “battles,” but at what cost? The “losing” woman in the narrative is often subjected a barrage of online hate, all in the name of crowning her counterpart as some sort of feminist victor.
This isn’t just a social media phenomenon—it’s a pattern we see mirrored in real life. From high school hallways to workplace gossip, women are pitted against each other over relationships, jealousy, or misguided judgements. We’re quick to turn on each other, often over trivial things like “stealing someone’s boyfriend” or simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time. These stories seem to transcend generations, almost as if they’re a tale as old as time.
But let’s be clear: this doesn’t mean that either party is always innocent or that we should ignore bad behaviour – accountability does matter. If someone betrays your trust or hurts you, you have every right to feel upset. Would you be okay with your best friend dating your recent ex? Probably not! However, in today’s era of cancel culture, we need to ask ourselves: is this public shaming and tearing apart of women the right solution?
So, what are we doing? We proclaim to support women, call ourselves “feminists,” and “girls girl” but when push comes to shove, we often don’t practice what we preach. Instead of standing in solidarity, we pick sides, fall into the trap of gossip, and allow loyalty to one woman to become an excuse for tearing another apart.
This loss of “sisterhood” doesn’t seem to be fuelled by pure hatred—it often stems from a misguided sense of loyalty. We sympathise with one side because we feel emotionally connected to that particular narrative. Take the Olivia Rodrigo and Sabrina Carpenter drama. Many of us have felt the heartbreak and jealousy of your ex moving on quickly with a girl you thought you were friends with. Because of this resonation, fans rallied around Olivia offering her up as the “perfect girl next victim” against the “conniving backstabber” Sabrina Carpenter. This emotional attachment drives much of the drama, with many quick to forget that there are often two sides to every story.
In the end, pitting women against each other isn’t helping anyone. It perpetuates harmful stereotypes, creating a culture of quick-judgment and criticism. Feminism isn’t about tearing others down to lift one woman up—it’s about equality, support, and understanding. We need to remember that real empowerment comes from understanding and forgiveness in the wake of misjudgement, not bitter rivalry.
The bottom line? Not every single feud should render someone cancelled. Whilst we may not agree with the actions of someone else, more often than not we can learn from it and use it to better understand how we should go about our lives in the future. The same should be applied to everyday life. Instead of buying into the narrative of rivalry and competition, maybe next time take a step back and think about the broader picture. Whilst this most definitely is easier said than done this does not make the conversation around this topic a pointless one but rather as a polite reminder of how we ourselves would like to be treated.