This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at NYU chapter.
I have to say it: women, we’re in a rut. I’m talking about a relationship rut. When it comes to everything else, we’ve got it made, so why can’t we figure relationships out? For the best relationship advice, I say, turn to movies. You’d be very surprised at what you can learn. You will never learn more about yourself and why you gaze out your window longingly and without purpose than from Say Anything. See? That movie altered all of your expectations for love and also for John Cusack. I’m still waiting for him.
Please, sit back and educate yourself with the most important relationship advice you’ll ever receive.
1. Serendipity – Whether you believe in serendipity and fate or not, you can learn a little something or two from this movie, which, by the way, is fantastic for watching with Ben & Jerry’s and your girlfriends. Essentially, if the timing isn’t right, it just isn’t right. That doesn’t mean it isn’t right forever, because as we see from the movie, things can change, but it just means you shouldn’t push it. Don’t force it. If it isn’t working right now, don’t worry and don’t wait for it to happen. If the opportunity comes again and this time the timing is right, then that’s your chance, and that’s how you know.
2. 27 Dresses – Sometimes you have to accept that someone doesn’t want you or didn’t choose you for that matter. Don’t make a fuss about it, and don’t sabotage him. Or your sister for that matter. Why waste your time on someone who doesn’t want you? Or to be clear, why do you want someone who doesn’t want you? Whoever the guy is, he isn’t worth it, and if he can’t see what he’s missing out on, then forget him. I would say something else about that, but I think you know what I’m getting at.
3. Like Crazy – Don’t have expectations that if you get back together with your boyfriend for the second (or whatever) time, things are going to return to normal and be the same. Time changes everything. It changes him, his wants, his personality, his career goals, his priorities, and more importantly, it changes you. You can’t falter on wanting what you had before or expect the relationship to be just as passionate and lovey dovey as before because you’re different now, too. So if you and your old boyfriend get back together, adjust your thinking. Things have changed now, and perhaps for the better.
4. Friends with Benefits/No Strings Attached – I’m using both of these movies because let’s face it: it’s basically the exact same movie with the lead girls from Black Swan. Either way, you can learn the exact same message: friends with benefits are always a bad idea. They can work, but they won’t work because someone will eventually want more. It might be fun in the beginning, but it almost always ends messily because wants and expectations change. So beware. It’s always a bad idea.
5. Something Borrowed – No man is worth losing your best friend over. No matter how much you want the guy, it doesn’t matter. He’s dating your best friend. Simple as that. Friends come first, and at the end of the day, a relationship is never ever worth losing a valuable friendship over. Keep your girlfriends close. These are the relationships to hold onto.
These pieces of advice are some of the most important lessons us women can learn from movies. Whether you’re in a happy or unhappy relationship or single and tirelessly scanning every face you see for potential, you can learn a little something from movies and John Cusack. Or at least younger John Cusack. Still waiting.