The Most Embarrassing Dating Stories EVER

1. Mucus Mood-Killer  “This year I went out on a date with a guy who lived on my floor. He picked me up and we walked together to a really fancy restaurant. The date was going great, nothing was awkward and it all seemed perfect. Then the food came. We started to eat when all the sudden out of nowhere he let out a huge, loud sneeze. Not only did he have boogers hanging on his face for the remainder of the night but his snot got all over my food. He knew it and apologized profusely. I politely smiled, boxed my food, and got a $1 slice of pizza after he dropped me off.”
2. Sushi Sickness  “I started dating this guy a year ago who I met through mutual friends. We had gotten coffee a few times before but finally ended up going out to dinner one Saturday night. I always get nervous during dates and worry about ordering too much to eat, so I decided that afternoon to grab some sushi from a dining hall. I was feeling great, until right before he picked me up from my dorm. My stomach was not agreeing with my spicy tuna roll. We walked to a cute little Italian restaurant and sat down. When we ordered drinks I felt super queasy and nauseous. When my spaghetti came, I took one look at it and ran to the bathroom and puked my guts out. The poor guy had to practically carry me home as I stopped at every corner to hurl in a garbage can. Never eating dining hall sushi ever EVER again.” 
3. FlabberGASted “I had been dating my boyfriend for a week, so things were very new. He decided to surprise me one night with roses and dinner at a great Mediterranean restaurant. I ordered a gyro, which was probably, in retrospect, a huge mistake. While the gyro was delicious, I did not foresee that I would be bloated and secretly trying to sneak farts all night. At first, I kept it under control. But then he said something hilarious and I burst into laughter AND ripped a huge fart at the same time. I was shocked and so was he. He wasn’t the only one who noticed–the couple next to us stared at me like I was a wildebeest from the zoo. We are still dating to this day but now I keep a little roll of Tums in my purse…and refrain from eating onions.”
4.  Burp Bust “If there’s one thing a girl learns from high school it’s that “watching a movie” is code for “let’s go somewhere to make out.” This guy who I had just started dating was super hot and I loved making out with him. One day we were in his room “watching a movie.” Things were getting really hot until in the middle of swapping tongues he decided to burp into my mouth. I literally stopped immediately and started coughing. It was absolutely disgusting. The worst part? He laughed and didn’t even apologize. Needless to say we are no longer “watching movies” together. 
5. Wrong Team “I have had a crush on this guy for the longest time. I finally got the courage to ask him out and we went out and had so much fun. I couldn’t believe we had so much in common! It really felt like we were connecting. Every time I tried to make a move though, it didn’t seem to work for some reason and I couldn’t figure out why. I finally worked up the courage to kiss him. After the kiss he said, “Wait you know I’m gay right?” I. was. instantly. mortified. He thought we were just going as friends to hang out…why are all gay guys in NYC so hot!? It’s just not fair.”   

^ Word. Fun fact: One of these dating stories is taken from my own personal experiences. Can you guess which one? 

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