Valentine’s Day can be a stressful time of the year for some people. Whether you’re single and can’t bear to scroll through another Instagram post of couples doing cute things like going out together, surprising each other with flowers or showering each other with gifts – if not, you’re on the other side of the spectrum: you’re stressing about what exactly you need to do to keep your partner engaged with you on this holiday. If you’re anything like me, Valentine’s Day can be stressful.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost four and a half years now and for almost three of those years, we were long distance. Celebrating Valentine’s Day over Facetime was not the easiest. It was heartbreaking to watch my friends go out with their significant others on Valentine’s Day while I pondered whether or not my boyfriend would be able to Facetime me; unless he was on deployment or something. Yes, my boyfriend was in the military – United States Navy to be exact. No Valentine’s Day was ever the same with this guy. One year we were out at the beach with him and his friends and enjoyed a sushi get together afterwards; the following year I spent it alone because he went to bootcamp. Another year we actually spent it together at home and played video games all night long. My point is this, if you’re struggling to keep your Valentine’s Days fun and frisky year after year, I suggest doing completely different things each year. Most importantly, we need to remember that Valentine’s Day is a holiday meant to be celebrated in the recognition of love. Materialistic items shouldn’t be of too much importance, but we’re only human.
Show them how much you love them:
To keep your Valentine’s Day fresh year after year, you must recognize that people love to be loved. Even if you have been with your partner for years on end, that doesn’t mean that you should stop showing them how much you love them. Whatever love language your partner has, work with it. For example, my boyfriend’s love language are words of affirmation. So, every year I make sure to handwrite a card expressing my love for him because I know he will appreciate it. I also make sure to tell him, face-to-face, how much I love and appreciate him, even when it’s not Valentine’s Day.
Choosing an activity:
Choosing the right activity to engage in on Valentine’s Day is more important than it sounds. You want to make sure you listen to your partner and to yourself when it comes to deciding what you both want to do. If you both want to celebrate your love by staying home, cooking a homemade meal or binge-watching your favorite TV show, so be it! If going on a double-date with your besties sounds more like you, do that! The possibilities are endless when it comes to celebrating love on Valentine’s Day, so have fun!
Keep the same effort as your first Valentine’s Day:
One thing I cannot express enough, easily one of the most important steps in keeping a Valentine’s Day fresh year after year is to not put in less effort than you normally do. It’s quite difficult to celebrate a holiday based on love when you feel your partner doesn’t care. For example, say you celebrate Valentine’s Day every year with your partner by handwriting a card for them and leaving them a box of chocolates on the kitchen table, then out of nowhere you decide to not do it for the next Valentine’s Day – just imagine how that would make your partner feel. I’m sure they would be sad, upset and confused as to why you didn’t do what you’d normally do; they might even think that you don’t care about them anymore. As silly as it may sound to some people, it hurts others… trust me.
The secret to keeping your Valentine’s Day fresh, year after year is to never forget that this holiday is meant to celebrate love! Remember to always base it off of love, not materialistic items. Learn your partner’s love language and have your partner do the same for you. Choose activities that the both of you find interesting and try to do something different each year. No need to spend hundreds of dollars – I’m sure your partner would be happy if they received a hand-written card from you proclaiming your love for them! Look back on past Valentine’s Days and try to give the future celebrations the same amount of effort or more to make sure your partner doesn’t feel unwanted. If you celebrate this holiday with only one thing in mind – love… you will never feel stressed on how to keep it fresh, year after year.