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Three Mindset Shifts That Changed My Life

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at ODU chapter.

Our actions, decisions and lives are often dictated by our mindset. We often don’t realize how our perspectives are shaped by the media we consume, the people we surround ourselves with, and more. We are collages of our own understanding, and all it takes is one alteration in that understanding to completely change the way we think.

Occasionally, challenging our ways of thinking is not only healthy, but necessary for growth. We cannot move forward as individuals if we continue to stay stagnant. This is why adjusting our viewpoints is so important. Whether you’re looking to grow yourself or are looking for your next perspective change, this article is the one for you. Here are three mindset shifts that changed my life.


You should be doing things based on love not obligation

Per this mindset shift; all of your actions should come from a place of self-love. Love for your body,  for your mind and for your spirit. We often create negative relationships with certain tasks because we feel obligated to do them. This can cause us to forget why we engage at all. All actions should be done to create a better life for ourselves. We are deserving of a life that is fruitful, healthy and safe. Some examples of this would be:

  • You shouldn’t clean your room because you have to. You should do it because you don’t deserve to live in a filthy room.
  • You shouldn’t go to the gym because you have to. You should do it because you deserve a body that’s healthy and well taken care of.
  • You shouldn’t do your homework because you have to. You should do it because you deserve to live an enlightened life enriched by quality education.

When we put ourselves and our development at the forefront of any decision, it eliminates the negative outlook we have on our responsibilities. We may not enjoy certain things we have to do, but knowing it will ultimately benefit us makes it worth it. We are worth the struggle, the trials and the work.

If you can’t shake the fear do it scared

Certain feats in life can be daunting, and those feats can cultivate anxiety or paranoia.  Whether that’s applying for a new position at work, traveling to a new place or even initiating a conversation, if we didn’t experience fear, we wouldn’t be human. However, it’s when we allow that fear to sideline us that we have to reassess ourselves. Fear is necessary, yes, but it’s not more powerful than we are. This mindset shift encourages us to not simply forget fear but to recognize it and act regardless of it.

If we can’t get the fear to go away, reframing our minds to leap regardless of fear will help. When we allow fear but continue anyway, we show ourselves that we are stronger than it. It takes practice, but this shift is incredibly powerful and worth it. The anxiety that grows around fear is natural. The first step to quieting the voice is to stop demonizing it and accept it for what it is: An obstacle, but not a permanent blockage. Remind yourself that just because fear is there doesn’t mean that something is unsafe. Work with it, don’t run from it.

Remember that you cannot change your life for the better unless you take a leap of faith. No one is saying to be fearless; we are saying to hold that fear as you run towards the life of your dreams if you must!


If being hard on yourself worked it would have worked by now

As an overachiever myself, this mindset shift was the hardest of all.

When we make mistakes, it is all too easy to beat ourselves up for them. We spend our time wishing we had acted differently, questioning why we didn’t realize sooner and working ourselves into a circle that ultimately serves no good. While a certain amount of self-inquisition is necessary for productive development, many people go beyond what is understandable and ridicule themselves. I am included in the lot of people who’d do this. But if that was beneficial to me, I wouldn’t continue to make mistakes, right? We wouldn’t continue to make mistakes, right?

We are human. Mistakes are not only inevitable, but required for growth. If there was any way to skip that by now, we would have. Truth be told, there is no benefit to you relentlessly replaying a slip-up over and over in your mind. This mindset shift encourages us to leave the extra shame behind because it’s not benefiting us. Instead, give yourself grace and have patience with yourself. You are doing the most productive thing possible: Learning. Growing. Experiencing life with no guide. The raw authenticity of your journey is working in your favor. It is teaching you in the best way possible, despite not feeling that way. There is nonstop value in trying and trying again, and there is no reason to criticize yourself for doing exactly that. Try this shift the next time you’re upset over a mistake. I can say from experience that it changes everything.

It’s not always easy to change our perspectives, especially when we’ve been viewing life from a certain lens for some time. However, it only takes one spark to light up your mind with new outlooks on experiences, trials and life itself. You never know what incredible realization is on the other side of you seeing things differently. Don’t hold yourself back from a new world because of old habits. Run towards the future with an open mind!

Sydney Alleyne is the Style Editor of ODU's Hercampus chapter and active staff writer. She is a fashion merchandising major and journalism minor. Sydney's passions include wellness, beauty, fashion, and content creation. In her spare time, you can find Sydney reading, creating content, traveling, and organizing PR events. Sydney is heavily dedicated to activism and the humanities, as well as community outreach.