Have you ever heard the phrases “fighting is good in a relationship” or “couples are always going to fight, it’s normal”? But how good can it be if it happens on a daily and creates untrust within a relationship? I can understand that partners in relationships are not always going to agree on everything and there are going to be differences between one another, but I personally do not believe that it should lead to fighting or a screaming match in order to get one’s point across.
Unless you have been living under a rock, you would know the impact of TikTok and the ability it gives its audiences of viewing videos from across the world. While I do not have TikTok on my phone, I have seen some of the videos shared on other social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram. Some of my favorites are the ones that come from the Mexican side of TikTok where people talk about growing up in Mexican households, traditions within the Mexican community, and also raise awareness on certain topics.
Something that I noticed was the conversations surrounding “toxic relationships”, and what really stood out to me was the glamorization of it. Women in the relationship were proudly claiming to be “la toxica” and men were described as “el toxico”. The videos have thousands of views and the comments consisted of people applauding them and making jokes about their toxic relationship. And unfortunately, there are many similar videos on the Latinx side TikTok that follow the same theme. While some might not take it so seriously, I suggest they do. I believe these relationships aren’t good for anyone’s mental health. While there might not be any physical marks left, that does not mean that damage has not been done. When it comes to toxic relationships and the glamorization of them, I believe it stems from the hyper-fixation of Mexican soap operas that many Latinx folks saw growing up. The characters in the soap operas would yell and fight with one another but they did so because they were “proving” that they truly loved each other. And if people were watching this as kids and weren’t being told that that’s not normal, then those same kids will grow up thinking fighting and yelling is common in relationships. But it shouldn’t be like that.
If there is no trust within a relationship, then you do not have a good foundation for your relationship. While there can be many reasons as to why someone would stay in a toxic relationship, if the red flags pop up early on, really think about if this is a relationship that you should keep pursuing. Everyone is deserving of love and being with someone that makes them happy, not someone who is always looking for a fight.