College is a time for growth. You meet so many new and different people throughout your time at university, and, sometimes, those new people or things that allow you to grow can conflict with the people or things you once considered important. Letting go can be hard, from letting go to that long-term relationship, that childhood friendship or even who you were back in high school. People do not realize, I feel, how much college students have to let go of, and I wish that when I began my first year at Ohio State, someone had told me it is perfectly ok, and even normal, to change who you are. So, here are some of the ways I learned to let go in college, and how I deal with losing things that may have once been important to me.
- Journal
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Now, like every girl, I grew up with a “super secret” diary that was pink and had a special lock on it that I would write in maybe once a year. When I got to college, I brought a similar little journal with me to school to use as scratch paper. However, when I dealt with losing friends and my high school relationship my very first semester, I felt super alone. I found that journaling down my feelings was a way to organize my thoughts and feel as if I was talking out my feelings with another person. I always feel better after I write down what is stressing me out at the moment, or what I am feeling upset about currently. It is the perfect way to speak your mind with no filter. It makes me take time to think about what I am writing, and that makes me feel as if my world isn’t completely spiraling. Plus, it’s nice to read through old entries and see how far I have come.
- Keep Busy
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On a campus like OSU, I find there is always something going on somewhere on campus. From sporting events to student organizations, I found that keeping busy was one of the best ways to keep my mind off things that I may be losing, like high school friends or being apart from family. I joined clubs and met so many people, several that I now consider my best friends. Another way to stay busy could be getting a campus job, and it’s great for earning a little bit extra income. I got a job as soon as I got to OSU , and it was great for occupying myself and prevented me from dwelling on certain things going on in my life. Not to mention, I also met some great people at work as well!
- Take yourself on dates
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One of the greatest things I did for myself my first year of college is I would take time, at least once a month, where I would take myself on a little date. It was a great way to remind myself that I am truly the most important person in my life, and that I should love myself. Losing people and friends is not fun, but we all need a little reminder sometimes that we are the most important person to ourselves, and we should treat ourselves like it. I would take myself to a little coffee shop or out to lunch, and if I felt like it, I would buy myself a bouquet of flowers to really treat myself.
- Talk to family
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Like most teenagers, my parents and I got into A LOT of arguments as I grew up. I thought I new everything, and they were right when they would say I definitely did not know everything. Coming to college and being away from my family, I have come to appreciate the small moments I get to see them. Whenever I am trying to decide to let go of a friends or a romantic interest, I give my parents a call to see what they have to say. They know a lot more than I do, and I know they always have my best interests at heart. They have helped me through losing lots of important people in my life up until that point, and taught me that people grow apart for reasons. Holding on to a toxic friend or controlling lover may feel like the safe option at the time, especially if it is a relationship you have grown accustomed to. However, take it from my experience when I say it is ten times better once you let go of that person and allow yourself to grow without them.