My four years of college couldn’t have gone by any quicker than they have.Â
I remember coming into college with the expectations that it would have gone by like a movie; with the fairytale romance and the happily ever after. However, this was not the case and I think it is very important for upcoming college students to be aware of that for three major reasons:Â
1. You end up chasing after an unrealistic fantasy
One of the most harmful aspects of expecting your college journey to be like the movies is that you end up chasing after an unrealistic fantasy. This is because you are holding a script in front of you and expecting life to mimic it. And more often than not, it creates this expectation of what ought to happen as opposed to what is actually occurring. This can cause you to be unaware of what is actually occurring in your own environment or campus culture (which is different and unique to every school). You miss out on what it is like to be a part of different clubs on campus or opportunities that are offered to connect with other people. Not to mention, if you are fantasizing about every person you meet being your potential partner, you are in for a rude awakening. Because unfortunately, it is most likely not fated that you and the first person of interest that you meet in college are meant to be together forever. And people are most likely not going to be sitting on the grass at all times of the day because if you attend SUNY Oswego, you know it is either too cold for that during the winter, and during the warmer months, classes are most likely still in session. That is, unless you can find some time.
2. You miss out on your very own, very real, journey
This might be one of the even more important aspects, but as a student, you miss out on your unique journey. If the movie plot is all you think about, you are more likely to be discontent with the journey that awaits due to constant comparison to something that isn’t even a reality itself. This might also cause you to feel like you are on autopilot in your own life instead of feeling as though you have autonomy. There are just certain things in life we cannot control, prevent, or even see coming, but having the ability to craft certain parts of our journey is definitely a possibility. For example, joining clubs and interacting and meeting new people are within that scope. This was a mistake I made during my first two years of college, and looking back now, I constantly wonder what it would have been like if I chose to be a bit more social and involved. Although I found clubs and activities that suited me eventually, the time that I lost was still a missed opportunity to connect, network, and meet some amazing people.Â
A major part of being in college is having the opportunity to learn about yourself, what you like, and your strengths and weaknesses. This is the time when you learn to be more comfortable in your own skin and explore the world around you, and in my opinion, this is an opportunity that is not worth missing out on.
3. You hold yourself back/waste your time
The third and final reason why it is important to prioritize your reality (unlike me) instead of the cinematic expectations of college, is because it will more than likely cause you to waste your time. When you spend so much time daydreaming, you don’t notice how much time goes by, nor do you realize the speed at which it does. Having experienced this myself, I know that it left me with a lot of regrets and what if’s that were absolutely avoidable. Time isn’t something you can take back and there aren’t any doovers. I think that it is important for students, especially freshmen, to know that living in the moment and taking things day by day is the best gift you can give to yourself. To allow yourself to be a part of a moment that will occur as the present once because after that, it will only be a memory of the past.
College is truly what you make of it. And even though I realized a bit later, I am grateful to have the opportunity to still take advantage of my current present (as a second semester senior) before my graduation in May 2022.