It’s that time of the year again. For one day, people spend their time thinking about that one, special someone. They splurge on the most chocolate shaped hearts, teddy bears and of course, red roses. But, if you’re like me, Valentine’s Day isn’t a day to be celebrated over. Some may kick up their feet; grab their favorite Ben&Jerry’s ice cream flavor, and watch something sappy like The Notebook. While others get prepped and pretty for their dates, people like myself (single) are going to be alone.
But what’s so bad about being by myself? Nothing. I have come to realize that guess what? I don’t need a man by my side to make me feel happy and complete. Lately, I’ve been reading books from class that actually gave me good advice. Ralph Waldo Emerson talks about self-reliance and only an individual can ever make himself truly happy. He writes, “We must be our own before we can be another’s.” His essays got me thinking about myself as a person and what I want.
For the last four years I was in two, two-year relationships, one after another. I never had a chance to discover who I was. Now listen, I’m not hating on Valentine’s Day and couples and relationships – I am all for them! But I have learned to be careful and although it might seem to be working from the outside, it’s what the relationship is based off of that matters.
Being single has made me open my eyes to a broader perspective on relationships and guys in general. Girls have to understand that they can’t go chasing for the perfect guy or forcing someone to change to fit a certain standard – just let it be. When girls try hard to get a guy’s attention, the relationship is going to end badly. Let a relationship blossom naturally. Also, each guy is different when it comes to expressing his feelings for a girl. I hate it! It is so frustrating to figure out boys. Sometimes I just want to punch them in the balls, (but that would be really mean) and give them some common sense. As a woman they don’t have the same thought processes as we do and how to exert feelings in a sensual way.
This semester I have to focus on who I am and what I want and once I know, then I think I can jump back into the game. I made a list of what I would like to do before the semester ends. Hopefully, by the end, I will have checked each one off. Thanks to my friend, he helped me put together this idea and so far I’ve checked off three. So ladies out there with men problems, just live life as you please! Even make your own list, but know that one day he will come.