She might have dated this person for a few months or a couple years, but the amount of time her relationship lasted is at times irrelevant when going through a painful breakup. So what’s a girl to do when their friend is in trouble? Be there! Sure it seems simple enough, yet being there for a friend requires a great amount of effort and support, especially when the breakup blues last a bit longer than expected.  In order to help smooth the “break-up” process for a friend, here are five tips to help you along.
- Have A Girl’s Night In
Grab the dark chocolate, ice cream, wine, etc. – whatever your poison. Laying around and satisfying a sweet tooth may help your friend relax. Pop in a DVD (make sure it’s not a romantic movie – too soon), invite some friends over, bring out the nail polish, put on some music, and you’re good to go. The whole point of having a girl’s night is to keep her distracted as well as let her blow off some steam. Maybe your other friends are having relationship issues as well and you can have a Divine Sisterhood moment and do a sĂ©ance to get revenge on former exes. (Just kidding, too creepy!) If staying in is a recurring theme in the upcoming weeks, try to convince them to have a night out on the town. Getting some fresh air will enhance their mood and they’ll thank you in the long run.
- Listen
Your friend’s ex might have been a sweetheart or a jerk who you’re glad to get rid of. No matter what your feelings are on the breakup, don’t voice them. This is the time to listen and not judge. Allowing her to cry or vent while you stay supportive is one of the most helpful tools in helping her through a rough period in any situation. Also, don’t give her advice on what she needs or does not need to do. If she wants advice, let her ask you first. The same goes for comparing breakup stories or telling her about a new boo in your life. Trust me, it’s not the time.
- Stop the Cray-Cray
What I mean by this is stop your friend from making any rash decisions. There are certain moments in our lives where it’s time for a physical change in order to feel better about ourselves and gain confidence. If your friend wants to begin jogging, great! If she wants a tattoo done at a shady tattoo parlor, stop her. Don’t let her cut her own hair or get a nipple piercing. If she still wants to do these things after the pain from the break-up has subsided, let her be happy and go along with her. Another way to stop the cray-cray is to try to keep her from calling, texting, or stalking her ex on Facebook. If you find that your friend is in more serious trouble than you thought, call for help somewhere such as the National Suicide Prevention hotline.
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4.   Don’t Push
Your friend may go through the same stages of grief as someone who has lost a loved one.  It’s natural to want to help them move on in order to feel better. However, try not to put her in situations she is not ready to handle. For example, trying to set her up with someone new may do more harm than good. The healing process will take some time, and she will know when she’s ready to move on. Simply help to guide her until she is feeling better.
- Â Remember to Take Care of You
Being a good friend is priceless and everyone can appreciate having that one friend who will always have your back, especially during a break-up. However, if you feel overwhelmed from having to constantly spend time cheering your friend up, take a step back. Take some time for yourself. Catch up with other friends, run errands you needed to do a week ago, or continue with your other interests. Don’t feel guilty about not spending all your time with your recently broken up friend. You have been more than supportive and will continue to be in the future. It’s important to know your limit, especially when you might be talking about the same topic for months on end. A little break between friends will also help prevent arguments from blowing up.
There are plenty more tips to help cope with a broken-hearted friend. However, you know your friend better than any one else, so see what tips work for you and improvise to help her (and yourself) get through this.
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