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A Letter to My Strong, Beautiful and Heroic Single Mother

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Pitt chapter.

As I sit here three-fourths of the way into my freshmen year, I cannot help but think about how crazy it is that I am where I am.  If you asked me ten years ago where I would be when I was nineteen years old, I never would’ve assumed I would be so lucky.  I never fail to realize that every single accomplishment I have achieved and every opportunity I have been given has been a product of your hard work, selflessness and determination.  The most amazing part of all of this is that you did it all on her own. You have truly seized the world and have never failed to amaze me with the grace through which you have done so.  So this is for you mom, may you never forget how grateful I am for each and every single thing that you do. 

Thirteen years ago, you were faced with the daunting reality that from then on, you were in this parenting thing alone. You had three young kids, all to yourself—to raise, to provide for, to teach, to inspire.  You wanted the best for us, but I know you must have been afraid that you wouldn’t be able to give us the world all on your own.  What you didn’t realize is the strength that you had, that you’ve always had, that you still have. This strength is what allowed you to raise three independent, caring, hardworking and loving children.

I cannot tell you how many times people have complimented me on my character, saying that I was “raised right.” While I enjoy the compliments and like to think that I hold a big part in the person I am, I know that I owe it all to you.  The list of lessons you have taught me is endless, but here are just a few that I will treasure forever:

1. Hard work is the only way to success.

You never let me forget it.  I know I can be lazy sometimes.  I give up on myself; I fail to realize my potential.  Sometimes, I want other people to do everything for me. But you would never let me hold that perspective for too long. You are my constant reminder that if I want something, it is my sole responsibility to work toward it. When I was a little awkward fourth grader who wanted to race the mile with a bunch of 8th graders at a track meet, but was too afraid to do it, you signed me up behind my back and pushed me to work hard so that I would eventually run that mile and cross that finish line. When I wanted money to go do something little, like go to Limited Too in the fourth grade to get a super cute new outfit or to do something much bigger, like go to New Orleans for a service trip, you always made me work for that money.  There are no handouts.  You made me work for every little thing.  And while I sometimes resented it growing up, I know that in the long run it was this that made me responsible and hardworking.

2. It’s okay to not be okay sometimes.

We both know I am quite the emotional train wreck.  I get upset easily, and when that happens you, are always right there to hold my hand or give me a hug. When I am frustrated or disappointed in myself, you reassure me and remind me that it is not the end for me.  While you are always there to console me, you are also there to tell me to toughen up and get through it—to move on and to conquer everything standing in my way.  You remind me to not let the small things get me down, and to always know that I am strong enough to overcome anything.

3. Never feel guilty about having a good time.

As long as I am smart while doing so, of course. For as long as I remember, you have surrounded me with endless fun (even some times, when I just wanted to go to bed but there was always tons of excitement happening downstairs that I just could not resist joining). When I get myself worked up over school, you always encourage me to take a break, to go out with friends, to reward myself for my hard work.  You always were the fun mom, and everyone knows it. You have taught me how to have a good time and enjoy each and every thing that life offers me.

4. There is nothing that I need to hide or be ashamed of.

This one applies to a couple of things.  First of all, you always encourage me to express myself and not hide elements of my personality from others or feel ashamed of the person I am. You have taught me how to embrace who I am and be confident in the person I have become, even at times when I may not like myself too much. In another way, you have always made it clear that there is nothing I should hide from you. There is no secret too deep or an action too shameful. I have always felt comfortable going to you with everything.  I’ve never had to hide it from you if I went to a party the night before and had a little too much to drink or if I got a bad grade on an exam.  Whatever the case was, I knew I could tell you and that I would not get in trouble, because I came to you and because I told you the truth.  It is this openness that makes our relationship so genuine. 

5. Life isn’t fair, as much as I hate to hear it.

Every time I complain about how the world is against me or I start feeling bad for myself, you remind me to stop moping around.  I am not going to go anywhere in life unless I accept my fate and make the most of it.

6. Together, we can get through anything.

Things haven’t always been so easy for us.  We have had our fair share of rough times.  Through all of these, everyone in our family sticks together.  We are each other’s biggest fans. Never will we go through anything alone. This not only applies to hard times, but to the good times too. We are always there to cheer each other on.  We love spending time together. We always support each other.  We encourage each other to overcome every obstacle and to chase our dreams. In good times and in bad, I can look next to me and know that you are right there beside me. 

7. I am loved, and you never let me forget it.

You might not be the mushy, touchy feely type, but I always know.  Not a day goes by where you fail to ask how I am or how my day is going.  You don’t ask with the intention of holding a polite yet mindless conversation; instead, you are sincerely interested in how I’m doing.  I value nothing more than coming into your room every night, laying in bed, and talking about anything and everything.  It is the best part of my day.  I always go to bed knowing that I am blessed with not only the best mom in the world, but also the best friend.

The list of lessons you have taught me is endless, but I am going to stop here and keep the rest right where they will be eternally, in my heart and in my mind.  I look forward to learning countless more lessons from you. Know that your strength and never-ending selflessness never go unnoticed. You were everything to me growing up. You are still everything to me. You’re my own personal super hero. Not many people can confidently say that they successfully raised three amazing children all on their own.  You honestly did an amazing job (I like to think I ended up okay). So here is to more lessons, more love, more nights cuddling up in bed and talking about anything and everything. Here is to you mom, thanks for giving me the world.

 

Xoxo,

Your biggest admirer

I am a Freshmen at the University of Pittsburgh with an intended double major in Communication Science and Disorders and hopefully English Writing.
Katie handles the day-to-day management, development and expansion of our chapter network to ensure that our on-campus presence is stronger than ever. She recently graduated from the University of Pittsburgh, where she studied Nonfiction Writing and Communication. Her extensive Her Campus background dates back to 2012 and she has since held the position of Campus Correspondent and Chapter Advisor. When Katie isn’t watching the Pittsburgh Penguins, you can find her trying new restaurants, obsessing over her long list of shows (The O.C., Scandal and Gilmore Girls are top picks) or setting out to find the perfect donut.