Did I Ask?

We all have that one friend who literally ALWAYS gives you their opinion even when not one fiber of your being asked for it. They just assume and feel it necessary to voice what they think about any given situation – especially ones about your life-  at all times. Some call themselves “advice-givers” or “honest” but I like to call them something a bit more colorful… I’ll leave the name calling to you.

Now, I don’t want to say that their opinions aren’t always unwanted or unneeded. Sometimes they are being great friends, looking out for your best interest and just want to be honest. Though other times, they are just giving their opinion because they want you to know that what they think is correct and that what you are thinking or doing is wrong. So how do you handle that? How do you deal with high opinion giving people?

You don’t. You don’t need to handle or listen to anyone you don’t want to listen to. An opinion is just that, it is someone else’s thoughts on what you should do to gain outside perspective but in the end, the only opinion that matters is yours and what you decide to do with that. It might be hard to tell a friend that you don’t want their opinion, it might cause problems/tensions in the relationship, and you might even get their opinion from that conversation but sometimes it has to be done. Often times people try to give their opinion on things they don’t even know anything about – they think they know but in reality, they are just speaking to hear themselves talk.

We now live in a society where opinions are given even when we specifically say we don’t want them. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions but not everyone should speak them. If that person is making an opinion based on quick judgments, shawty facts, and stubbornness then they probably shouldn’t speak – whether it is a political, personal, or a third party issue. The only opinions worth considering (because remember, you don’t need to listen to them to begin with) are those that you know were carefully thought out and reputably made by someone.

A big common occurrence I have noticed is the involvement of third parties in other people’s relationships. Your friend doesn’t like your new SO? Well too bad, you do and that is what should matter and what that friend should focus on. Someone thinks that you’re spending too much time with your boyfriend/girlfriend? It’s not their time so why do they care? Granted, I understand if the friend misses you but that should probably be communicated a lot better than accusatory, opinionated statements. Or my favorite opinion regarding relationships – I don’t think it’s going to work out with you two/You’re wasting your time. Hmm, one would hope that a friend doesn’t give this type of opinion without REALLY (and I mean really) considering all facets of the outside relationship they are so apparently invested in.

So how do you confront someone who is giving their opinion waaaay too much and it’s bothering you? Speak to them. It is not that hard to have a conversation with someone about how they are coming off and how you would prefer to be spoken to, but it can be difficult to bring up. If they are your friend, they will understand and (hopefully) change their behavior. If they stop giving the unwanted opinions, great. If not, remember – you don’t need to listen to them. Being friends can still be an easy task, just be wary of topics that could stir an opinion. If that doesn’t work, refer to the lovely gif below.

But hey, those are just my opinions. (wink)

Image Credits: 1 2 3 4 5 6

• feelings
• friendship
• opinions
• thoughts