Everyone falls in love differently and at their own pace. So with that, how DO people fall and love and what does “love” mean to them? Here are a handful of stories about love, being in love, and the whole process:
Nici:
I honestly think love gets a bad rep these days. I get it; relationships are a lot harder to maintain in today’s society, especially with tinder, hookup culture, and people simply wanting to focus on their career before anything else. However, isn’t it just nice to hear a love story every now and again? So to get me in the Valentine’s Day mood, I asked people to tell me a story about love. It could be about falling in love, meeting the love of their life, or just love in general. Some go to Behrend, others are strangers. So enjoy, because nothing is sweeter than love.
- “Random girl fell in a bar and smashed her nose open, I held everything together under a bar towel, ended up riding in the ambulance with her because they saw no need for me to release the pressure just to re-apply it and they thought we were together anyway, I get to the hospital and stick around to make sure she isn’t dead as hell, they keep her for the night on some intense pain meds, I have no cab money, no atm nearby, and no good friends for a ride home, everyone thinks we are together already so I just crash in the little shared room space she had, next day we chat a bit I buy her a coffee that she could barely drink, she gives me cash for a cab and her number, we go on some dates, boom here we are together.”
- “How I fell in love with my current boyfriend: First off, we matched on Tinder. We talked for about a day and then I found out he didn’t live around me and was only around my area for work so it died out pretty quickly. We followed each other’s social media accounts but nothing ever came about it. Then on my birthday, I was feeling confident so I ended up messaging him: giving him my number and saying we should talk more. We immediately hit it off and talked nonstop for a few weeks until finally, he wanted to hang out with me in person. So he bought me a train ticket for me to go all the way from Erie, PA to Kansas City, Missouri (which is where he is from). You don’t just go halfway across the country for anyone so basically, that’s when I knew I was falling in love with him. I went and had the best week meeting him and his family. They ended up inviting me back for the 4th of July and then invited me to go on their family road trip to California. We’re in a long distance relationship but it works out perfectly for both of our busy schedules. It’s a lot of driving 12 hours one way for him to come see me or jumping on a flight to go see him, but he is definitely worth every dollar and minute. He is my best friend and we get along perfectly (he doesn’t even mind my extremely difficult attitude). A year later and we are happier than ever.”
- “Falling in love is the most unique feeling in the world. The verb ‘falling’ is an accurate one – there’s nothing else you can focus on, nothing else that matters. Looking back on it afterward that’s exactly what it feels like, falling. It can come on you suddenly, when you aren’t expecting it, with somebody you’ve met before, or it can be almost instantly like it was in my case. I may be biased since I’m describing what it was like falling in love with my future wife, but falling in love is the best feeling.”
- “I think the best word I could use to describe my first encounter with love is awkward. It seems to be almost a rite of passage for teenagers in some ways. Getting over that first “love”, if you can even call it that seemed like a daunting task. But as far as the feelings I experienced, I remember the nerves, the tingling sensations, what some call “butterflies”. Yeah, it may sound sappy and cliche, but those things really do happen to people the first time they think they’re in love. For myself, and some of my friends this was definitely the case.”
- “Choosing them isn’t a choice anymore, you just do it. By that I mean you don’t choose to make time for them even on a crazy day, you just do it. You don’t choose to not take your bad mood from a shitty day at work out on them, you just don’t. If you see something you know they will love, you send them a pic or buy it just because you know they will love it. You aren’t choosing to do any of that stuff, you just do it because you love them and you want them to know that.”
- “He sat behind me in my algebra class. One time I turned around to hand him an assignment and he was sitting there in a full body Pikachu costume. He just nodded and said ‘What’s up.’”
Brittany:
I think how you feel love depends on your age. When you’re young you feel it all at once and it’s just this feeling you think you have and are supposed to feel and you roll with it, but as you get older you realize that love is manifested in different forms and you can recognize it more easily in those forms.
The first time I said “I love you” to someone was in the 10th grade, at my 16th birthday party. He was my first real boyfriend. He was chasing me around the thing that spits the bowling balls out at you and he just blurted it out. We had been officially dating for only a week or so when he said it. I ran away, but then later said it back before he left my party. That relationship was off and on for about six years and we discussed in later years that that wasn’t when we meant “I love you”, we just thought it was something that should have been said at sixteen years old. The real “I love you” came later.
The next time I said it to someone was over Thanksgiving break. I was dating my boyfriend for about two months at the time, but we had been exclusive I guess for about four months and had known each other and worked with each other for two summers. At 22, I’m pretty sure about what I want but I’ve never really had a grasp on my feelings until this guy. Everything just kind of clicks and falls into place with him, so when I started thinking “I love you” after goodnight texts or when he did something cute I didn’t really question it. Except that I overthink everything and started to question it because the last time I said it, I was only a week and a half in the relationship and that didn’t last so was I going too fast? Am I insane for thinking this already? I wanted to throw up. After talking with one of his closest friends, I realized that it wasn’t an “I’m just supposed to say this” feeling, it was real. I loved the guy. So I planned out how I was going to say it to him over break; I was going to do it at the zoo where we met by the gorillas which was the first place we hung out. Nope. Chickened out. On the last day of Thanksgiving break, we went on a walk in his hometown and I just let it out. I said it and felt nauseous and happy at the same time, but I wouldn’t change it.
I decided to ask my boyfriend and my childhood best friend what their takes on realizing you love someone was and here is what they said:
- Nicki: “I fell in love with him over the course of a few months. We had just broken up and I had spent a few months missing him. One night, after band camp (ha), I was doing more thinking than normal about him, and I made my way over to his house. I just wanted to talk to him about what happened between us and thought it would help me. However, when I got to his house, all of my previous feelings flooded through me and I knew I couldn’t stand to be away from him any longer. We talked for hours through the night and decided to try again. We both cried, and he told me he loved me. I knew right then that I loved him too. This was almost 6 years ago, and we are stronger than ever!” They really are stronger and it’s the best feeling seeing your best friend happy.
- Matt: “Love is something that doesn’t just happen at a certain time. It builds up over time and the more time you spend with someone, the more you realize that you love them and love being around them. As you sit by yourself some days, you realize that you would rather be spending time with that person. Love is the sense of never being tired of just hanging out with your significant other. Realizing that you love someone can be super exciting. A little void in you feels to have finally been filled and it’s something that you can’t explain.Some people jump into relationships and love, but you need to take it slow. You need to spend time with that person, in person. You may start to “like” something through texting or Snapchatting, but until you sit with that person or hang out with them, you can never decide if you love them or want to date them. It is probably someone’s safest bet to just hold off on dating until you are 100% sure.Saying “I love you” first is extremely stressful, so it is probably the best to let the other person say it first, honestly… At the end of the day, finding the right person is very rewarding. You spend each day happy because that person is always there for you.I met the girl I date at work, but I had known her for over a year before we even talked that much. I became friends with her after she told me stories after the craziness of the days she spent at work. We went the entire rest of the summer without really being too romantic and stuff picked up with her when we were both away from each other at school. Over Thanksgiving break, we went on a hike and she said “I love you” first. Of course, I felt the same way, so that was awesome.”
Tiffany:
- “For me, you know you had fallen in love with someone when your first priority is their happiness and not your own. This is different from just loving someone. Love is the warm, fuzzy feeling you get when you constantly want that special someone by your side, and you can picture a future with them. The distinction is important because no two people have the same exact definition of being in love and loving someone..”- Gregoire Levet
- “I knew I loved my boyfriend one night while we were laying in the back of his car. It was about December last year and we were listening to Ed Sheeran together, an artist we both loved. We were having a casual conversation about who knows what and then suddenly, mid-conversation something changed. I knew that what I was feeling was different. I realized that I needed him in my life for as long as I could and that he was my best friend. So, with all of this excitement in me, I told him. Now, here we are over a year later and happier than ever.”- Abbey Bordone
- “The first time I fell in love, I was sitting by a river with a guy. We have been talking for a little while and we sat on the ground and started opening up to each other about a lot of personal things in our lives. Then he wrapped his arms around me and I looked into his eyes and knew that he was the one. I loved how he made me feel safe and beautiful. I’ve been in love ever since.”- Anonymous