In life, there are universal lessons that everyone eventually learns on their own. As children, we’re taught the difference between right and wrong, the importance of treating others the way we want to be treated, and that practice makes perfect.
These basic sayings are ingrained in us to help build a moral code. We watch how older people behave and listen to what they tell us, which helps us understand how the world works and how to navigate it.
However, there comes a time when, despite being given advice, we do the exact opposite. Sometimes, these lessons must be learned firsthand, even if someone has already pointed us in the right direction.
My mom has always been the person I turn to for advice. She says that ever since I was little, I’ve been very stubborn. So, even when I asked for her opinion, I often didn’t follow it because of that stubbornness.
I don’t see that as a bad thing. When I reflect on her advice, I realize she offers it because she’s learned and grown from her own experiences. While she’s probably right, she had to come to those conclusions after facing her own life lessons.
I could listen to her and avoid making bad decisions, but if I did that all the time, I’d never get to learn these lessons for myself.
Part of growing up is recognizing what situations have taught you. Experiences can be positive or negative, but there’s always a lesson to be learned. Growth comes from taking what you’ve learned and applying it to your life to avoid making the same mistakes.
If you don’t, the universe will keep giving you the same lesson over and over until you finally master it.
A perfect example of this is when people are going through a breakup. People often wear rose colored glasses in relationships and can’t see things clearly. My mom has told me countless times that someone isn’t right for me, and while I know she’s probably right, it’s a lesson I insist on learning for myself.
The same goes for my friends. When they’re dealing with a tough breakup, I share my experiences and try to give them advice. They understand what I’m saying, but it doesn’t change their minds.
Love is one of those things where people have to learn the lesson on their own, no matter how good the advice is.
Life is full of experiences, and with each one, you learn something new about yourself and the world around you. I’m not saying you should never listen to advice — sometimes you absolutely should.
But there’s something rewarding about figuring things out for yourself. It helps you discover who you are as an individual. Every stage of life brings new lessons, and your decisions will be influenced by what you’ve learned in the past.
Sometimes you just have to go with your gut and do what feels right for you, and if it turns out to be the wrong choice, that’s okay too because you’ll learn from it.
Ultimately, we all learn and grow in our own time and in our own way. And when the lesson finally sinks in, the advice-givers can say those ever-so-annoying yet liberating words: “I told you so.”