It’s that time of the semester when you are so close to being able to go home, but not there just yet. Maybe you were homesick a week or two before Thanksgiving, or maybe it’s hitting you right now. All you want to do is wrap your arms around your mom, but there’s still a bit of time before that can happen.
Going through these emotions myself for the past few months, I’ve realized how different homesickness is portrayed versus how it actually feels. Here are a few examples of what actually happens
1. You Compare Everything to Home
Obviously, when going to college in a different town or even state than what you are used to, things are going to be different. The food isn’t going to be the same (not even close), the scenery is different, and sometimes you might not even know anyone. Everything in your normal surroundings is changing and instead of adapting and working with it, your first thought is to compare it all to the home you know and are comfortable with.
Just this week I’ve caught myself doing this twice. I never thought I would be whining about how Massachusetts has better foliage than Pennsylvania or drooling over the thought of the small Italian restaurant in my hometown while bashing the food in State College (sorry). However, here we are.
2. Loneliness
There’s two sides to this homesickness side effect. The one that I’ve experienced the most this year is a lack of wanting to go out and socialize, leading to loneliness. My room on campus has become my home away from home, making it hard for me to want to actually leave to go socialize. It’s easy to take the one space we have and isolate ourselves rather than viewing the entire campus as our temporary home to explore.
The other side effect is limiting yourself from going out to explore and talk to people and closing yourself off to everything and everyone around you. Physically, you could be in a conversation, but mentally you have blocked off the chance to even try to form connections with others. Essentially, you aren’t allowing yourself to fully explore what should be your new home and keeping yourself at bay.
3. Loss of Motivation
Homesickness means having no motivation to do anything. You’d rather stay in bed all day and sulk. Sometimes it can even go as far as not taking care of your hygiene. School work becomes hard to accomplish and even the simple task of cleaning your room seems impossible to get done.
Now that you know some of the signs of being homesick, here are some things you can do to help it.
4. Go Out
Don’t lock yourself in your room to sulk, it does nothing for you or anyone. I’m not saying you have to go out and party or anything like that, you could just go out and sit in a coffee shop for a few hours or take a walk. The worst part of getting out of your room is making the starting move to do it, once you’re out you’ll feel so much better.
5. Do Something You Want to Do
This can kind of contradict the first one if you want to stay in and do something, but seriously, do something as self care. Whether that would be reading a book, watching a movie or getting your nails done, anything helps. Just make sure it’s something you will enjoy.
6. Call Home
Sometimes the best fix can be to hear from home. Listening to the voice of a parent or a close friend can help to ease your thoughts. Be careful with calling too often though, you might become too reliant. It’s important to find a healthy balance to ease your homesickness, but not make it worse.
When I first learned about homesickness, I mainly heard stories about people going to college away from home, crying for a few weeks, and then after a while they just “got over it.” I never realized how hard it would actually be to deal with. In fact, I don’t think I’ve actually cried about missing home, instead I’ve just constantly dreamt about being able to go home and seeing my family again.
Although there is an awareness that many students will become homesick when entering college, there isn’t as much knowledge given on what it actually is and the things that can be done to help it from damaging our daily lives. I hope you found these signs and tips helpful!