In the fast-paced culture of dating in college, it seems that everyone is either in a relationship or hooking up 24/7. This may not be the actual case, but for us single girls, we can often feel the pressure of wanting to find someone, anyone, to make us feel less lonely. But what we often aren’t told is that it’s ok to be picky. Being single and not dating can often make people think we’re crazy, but the truth is – we know our worth. We’re allowed to wait for the love we deserve, and here’s why:
1. As much as you want a relationship, not everyone is good for you.
We’ve all been there, whether it’s the obvious bad boy notorious for being a player or the good guy merely claiming he’s “different.” We can sometimes be so blinded by desire that we forget to watch where we’re falling. Although having a guy to talk to or being in a relationship can feel great and fulfilling, it’s important to make sure your guy is on the same page. Way too often we overlook the warning signs that he isn’t right for us because we want so badly for our fantasies to come true, which results in unhealthy heartbreak.
2. Wait for someone who makes you a better person.
Being in a relationship is about growing and learning together, like being partners in crime against the world. If the frat boy who’s only texting you while drunk at three o’clock in the morning is making you feel worthless, get rid of him! There’s no reason to cling to a person who’s holding you back from growing and making you feel unhappy or upset. You can’t better yourself when he’s making you feel worse. There will be someone out there that lifts you up.
3. Look for sparks and passion, not convenience.
When all your friends are in a relationship or hooking up, it can be really hard to be the single girl standing in the corner alone. Too often we settle for the first guy that gives us attention because our hopes and desires are so strong. When we pick someone simply because they
re there or because they seem “good enough” we lose out on a relationship built out of passion. You should feel a spark that you haven’t before. Settling is hindering your own chances for something truly great.
4. Being alone is better than being treated like less than your worth.
When you’re single, it’s a great time for self-love and care! By not being in a relationship, you can completely focus on your own happiness, goals, and life. If all your time and attention is being spent on a guy who isn’t treating you right, you’ll begin to feel that energy. If he ignores you for days, you’ll feel like something’s wrong with you. This unhealthy cause and effect tends to make us blame ourselves, when really our partner is the one not understanding that we deserve better.
5. The right guy is out there somewhere and it’s okay to wait.
Although we’re young college students there can still be a ticking clock that tells us we need to find a relationship right now. Many of us have had our picture-perfect dreams of meeting our husband in class by a freak chance of events. But it’s ok to wait. It’s ok to be single for as long as you need to be. Most importantly, you can be picky! Wait for the guy who sweeps you off your feet and rises above and beyond in loving you. You know how much you’re worth and one day, somebody else will think your value is even more than that. Wait for that person. It will happen for you and when it does, you won’t regret waiting for it.
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