Self-love has earned its reputation as a buzzword in today’s society- we hear it circulate on social media and filter in and out of inspirational quotes trending on the web. As humans, love is something we all want to give and feel. By default, we tend to look for love from others. We exhaust ourselves through seeking external stimulation that can leave us feeling drained and empty. Most of us probably understand that we have to practice self-care, but that in itself can sometimes make us feel selfish. It’s too easy to look in the mirror and pick apart who we see. It is vastly underrated how important it is to learn to love who you are. To thank our bodies, rather than criticize them. To listen to our minds, rather than fight our thoughts. To grow with our experiences. Self-love is practice, but it’s the most important love of all.
Here are five reasons why you should love the person in the mirror the most:
- You are your biggest commitment
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The biggest commitment you must have is with yourself. There is only one of you and we serve as our very own rescue. The light we need to shine through life’s darkness is within us, not our parents, siblings or friends. This light is our own responsibility. A responsibility to listen to ourselves, to embrace our talents and to treat our body and mind with care. To fully experience life as it happens to you. And then, equally importantly, continually seek ways to physically and psychologically grow from your experiences. Self-love is practice, but once you learn how to devote yourself to yourself, you will begin to fall in love with who you are.
- It makes it easier to communicate with others
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Self-love grants us the capacity to connect with others. Open communication and transparency isn’t something we are all comfortable with, however; it begins with taking the time to figure out who you are and what your intentions are. Once you can fully understand this about yourself, you will be able to engage in honest conversations with others. Deeper connections with others will stem from understanding yourself and loving yourself in full. Identify and acknowledge your standards and goals to not only help you communicate with others, but to seek out those who will help support and guide you for who you are.
- You become comfortable with your unapologetic self
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With self-love comes confidence and understanding that every day isn’t going to be your best day. Self-love helps you accept your bad days and to see the negatives as opportunities to learn and grow. When we love who we are, we are kind and forgiving to ourselves. It allows us to laugh off our mistakes and remind ourselves that we are only human. To love yourself in full means to accept yourself as you are and understand the parts of you that you cannot change. Self-love also opens us up to vulnerability and willingness to take risks without fear of judgement or failure. Self-love helps us feel free.
- Helps you get comfortable with saying ‘no’
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Saying ‘no’ to people isn’t always the easiest thing to do because we sometimes fear disappointment or anger. When we love ourselves, we get comfortable with this avenue. You will understand that you are your first priority and that, for your own mental health, it’s okay to say no sometimes. You will be able to turn down things that don’t align with your values and will be confident in your decisions, independent of others reactions.
- Helps you achieve happiness in other relationships
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If you don’t love yourself first, you will have a difficult time understanding and accepting love from someone else. You may question how they could care about you and doubt their words of affirmation, no matter what they say. If you are unable to recognize your own worth, you won’t believe in what others see in you. You may fear disappointing others or abandonment and thus avoid getting attached. Loving yourself helps you let this love in and genuinely value expressed care from others, whether this be in a romantic relationship or friendship. Self-love allows for these relationships to grow and become more intimate. When we love ourselves, we have a desire to open up to others. You possess a heightened willingness to self-disclose, helping the two of you share a greater attachment and feeding into deeper connections in our lives.