Moving away from home can be hard, especially when you deal with mental illnesses. I was very excited to become a part of the Queen’s community in first year because I thought being away from home would make me into a stronger person. Unfortunately, I spent most of first year alone in my dorm room; too afraid to leave for fear of there being people being in the hallway, too shy to reach out for help and too unmotivated to do anything productive.
The first step onto the path of recovery is to be properly diagnosed. Have you been experiencing symptoms for a while? Is it affecting your every day life? It might be useful to complete some online diagnoses.
The next step is to seek help. This is probably the scariest part and I remember being very adamant of dealing with it on my own, which definitely made things even more difficult and didn’t help me at all in the long run. Realizing that sometimes you need someone to help you sort things out is scary but it will be a very courageous act of self love.
Luckily, there are many resources available to you at Queen’s. You can talk to someone at the Peer Support Centre in the JDUC about absolutely anything. They are open from noon to 10 pm every day. The volunteers there are trained to provide students with resources and they can direct you to someone more fine tuned to what you need. It is by far one of my favourite resources because venting to someone who can give a completely objective opinion is extremely enlightening. Talking to someone when you’re having an amazing day and spreading joy is fun too!
The Student Wellness Centre is also equipped with many counsellors and psychologists who may be of help as well. Generally, there is a 4 appointment limit per semester but it is flexible on a case by case basis. If you feel like you would also like to delve not only into counselling services but also medicinal therapy, making an appointment with a psychiatrist would allow you to learn more about medication options.
It is very important to have a support system that you can rely on but during vulnerable periods, it might be hard to steer clear of being in a toxic relationship.
Someone once told me that anxiety and depression are like sisters, when one appears, the other one is very likely to come along with it. It is such a conflicting combination because on one hand you are worrying about everything, especially things out of your control but at the same time you can feel numb and empty. It’s a constant struggle between not caring at all and caring too much.
This is why it might be hard to maintain healthy relationships because small things might be blown out of proportion and might be triggering. It is very, very important that your partner or even your friends don’t shame you for having feelings and that you feel secure. It is okay to remove people who do not make you feel good about yourself from your life.
One thing I found very helpful when I feel like I’m down in the dumps is to take myself out of the situation and tell myself things that I would say to a friend who is going through the same thing. Reimagining the person you want to be and setting a small goal to work towards; that is a great way to motivate yourself to push forward. It is so easy to get caught up in feeling down that you forget to move forward and that you can pull yourself out of the bubble. It does take a lot of inner strength which is why talking to a counsellor, a therapist, a psychiatrist, a psyschologist or any trusted individual would really help see things from an unclouded, rational point of view.
Chronically overthinking is one of the main struggles of anxiety because it always brings a feeling of impending doom into your life. Feeling depressed also may stir up dangerous thoughts of self harm. Something that would be helpful to combat these negative emotions and thoughts is to keep yourself preoccupied with hobbies that you enjoy and to surround yourself with positive energy and people. For me, I discovered that writing down all my feelings and thoughts during a set time frame would allow me to express myself without wasting too much time overthinking.
If you suffer from panic or anxiety attacks, there is an app called “Emergency Chat” you can download and personalize so you can pass your phone along to someone around you if you are incapable of speaking and they can act accordingly.
Grades are important but overall health should be a top priority. Over the years, I have learned to not beat myself up when I am having a bad day or even a bad week. People relapse and it is a very human response to stressors. All that matters is that you know that feelings of anxiety and depression are not here to stay and as long as you keep working towards feeling better about yourself and about the future. That is commendable progress.
Remember to always be your own best friend. Cheers!