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The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Queen's U chapter.

Rejection sucks.

But, after multiple bouts of rejection, you start to learn something. Perhaps rejection is not the universe hating you, but rather that your path is already pre-determined and every “rejection” is actually just a redirection.

Let’s face it: we’ve all questioned ourselves after a rejection. Whether it be a rejection in school, hobby, work, or a romantic or platonic relationship, we’ve all asked ourselves, “why is this happening to me?”

It’s difficult to experience rejection and not question, “why?”. But something I’ve learned over the years is that you’ll make your life so much easier if you stop questioning the “why” and look into the “what if?”

What if you didn’t get hired for that job because there is actually a better one out there waiting for you? What if you and that friend stopped talking because their season in your life is over? What if everything that you’re going through is actually preparing you for what you’ve been asking for?

When looking at the bigger picture, everything is actually working in your favour. When something doesn’t work out, it’s not the end of the world. As a matter of fact, when something doesn’t work out the way you thought it would, you are actually being brought closer to where you need to be:; when one door closes, another one opens.

Train yourself to remember that when one plan doesn’t exactly go as planned, there is a lesson to be learned and a bigger and better door waiting to be opened!

Rejection does hurt but there are ways to cope with it!
  • Acknowledge your feelings. Give yourself permission to feel sad. When you express your emotions, you are allowing yourself to heal and reflect on the experience without judgement.
  • Reflect on what you could have learned from the experience. Every experience comes with a lesson to be learned, so take some time to figure out what this experience could have taught you.
  • Practice self-compassion and self-care. The worst thing you can do following a rejection is criticizing yourself. Have empathy for yourself as you would for your friends. Along with that, reconnect with yourself by engaging in activities which you love and genuinely enjoy!
  • Focus on what you have achieved so far. Sometimes, it’s really easy to focus on what has gone wrong, and forget what you have achieved so far. When rejection creeps up on you, remember all of the wonderful goals you have accomplished, what you have learned, and the amazing people you have met along the way.
  • Stay positive. Rejection is always temporary.
  • Accept new opportunities with open arms. Don’t ever shy away from new opportunities which come your way. Go at life with an open heart! Meet new people and try new things, regardless of the outcome, you will always come out of each experience more knowledgeable.

Never be afraid to take risks. Through the risk-taking process, we learn about ourselves as well as the world and people around us. If you haven’t faced rejection of some sort lately, you may be getting too comfortable with where you are.

Here’s something to think about when times get tough. Ask yourself if you’ve ever gotten through a process and come out weaker from it. I doubt that your answer will be yes. Rejection helps us grow and it is a valuable process in not only helping us develop as individuals, but in leading us to our destiny.

I strongly believe that our lives are pre-determined. Of course, many may disagree, but I think that you will always end up exactly where you are meant to be. No matter the circumstances or doubts, every connection and experience is meant to happen to you. They will collectively lead you to your highest self and teach you the most about life.

They say that if there is something which you genuinely cannot get out of your heart and your head, it’s because a future version of you already has it. Take peace in knowing that if you don’t have it now, don’t fret; it will be yours when the time is right. Chill and enjoy the ride! Never stress over something which doesn’t work out: what is meant for you will always come to you. The situations which are difficult in your life serve as turbulence to teach you something and get you on the correct path.

Rejection is not the end of the road. Most times, it’s a detour leading to a greater opportunity. Enjoy the experiences of life and take pride in each rejection serving as a redirection in your life.

Emma Keyes

Queen's U '24

Emma is studying English Language and Literature at Queen's University. She enjoys the arts, and is a sucker for all things romantic.