Many students enter into their college experience with the mindset that they are going to hook up with people and not get into any serious, committed relationships. As many of you probably know or are just finding out, it doesn’t always work or turn out the way you planned.
Although college is a resource for learning and educating oneself, it is also used for students to meet and socialize with one another. In the beginning semesters of your college life, it may seem as easy as going to parties and hooking up with the first cute guy who starts chatting with you. As you slip into that every weekend routine, many start to feel like they could use something different, something better than just hooking up with random people you will never speak to again. They may feel like finding that one person who they will be hooking up with every weekend or whenever.
It is tough to find a guy who will keep coming back for more even if it is just for the sole purpose of hooking up because eventually something, good or bad, is going to come out of it. One person will start developing feelings for the other; another could not feel anything at all and just treat the situation as solely a hook up and nothing else. That is usually how it goes, but on a rare occasion both people may start having stronger feelings. This is when the cycle begins.“John and Jessica sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage!” This has been used to tease children up into middle school for years, but that’s not exactly how it works in college. It goes something like this: John and Jessica sitting in a dorm. K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes hooking up, then comes being “together,” then comes exclusivity!
Hooking up is how the relationship starts off. When the two people finally figure out that they may have feelings for one another then they will make the decision to be “together” and only hook up with each other. At that point in the process, it is not known to the public that the two are official. Once they decide that they would like to be considered boyfriend and girlfriend is when they become exclusive…this usually happening by changing their relationship statuses on Facebook.
Being in a relationship who attends the same university as you may seem easy, but it can be difficult. You have to set boundaries and know when the other wants their space. Are you going to sleepover to their room and how many days out of the week? How many nights of the weekend will you hang out together? These are a few of the speed bumps you may run into along the way because college relationships aren’t as simple as they may look. Another factor is what if the person you start dating doesn’t attend the same college? Many people think that there are the toughest kinds of relationships which may be true for some couples because distance takes a toll on the relationship. Here are a few tips: Communication is key. You two don’t necessarily have to be in constant communication throughout your days but Skyping a night here and there or talking on the phone helps. Even texting throughout the day works too. Be as understanding as you can. You two aren’t in the same area so you will definitely have different schedules
College relationships can work. Just accept as much drama as you find in a day time soap opera.Â