It’s was so hard being away from my best friends. I mean, it wasn’t even two weeks into break, but I already felt like I was missing so much of my daily support system. But, to sort of compensate for this lack, me and one of my besties, not entirely purposefully, had hours long video calls pretty much every day. They were great for fulfilling my need to have deep conversations with someone who really knew what was going on in my life, but they also just got me thinking.
As a best friend, there are certain things that you’re just going to end up doing. You may have to put a lot of effort into doing them if they’re not your usual ways of functioning, or they may come as easily to you as breathing. Either way, any good best friend will tell ya, these are just part and parcel of wearing the title of BFF.
1. Self-Esteem Boosting
Everyone has bad days, sometimes bad weeks and even months. These sorts of things wear down even the best of us, and that little voice somewhere in your head starts to whisper a lot of things. But before you know it, that little voice starts speaking in your own voice. “I’m so stupid.” “Why did I even think I could do this?” “Wow, I just fail at everything.” And with the right wry grin, shrug, and eyebrow raise, everyone just laughs it off. But not your best friend.
Your best friend is the one who knows you well enough to know that you’re not joking. You are being all too serious. Your bestie knows your voice so well that when that nasty little voice starts speaking, they know it’s not you. And oftentimes, consciously or not, they are the one to step in and say, “Ok, but you learned something from this” or “So what? You’re still amazing.” Even if they say it with a punch on the shoulder, a silly face, and ice cream. Because after all, just the fact that your awesome best friend still wants to hang out with you after you royally screw up means that you can’t be all bad, right?
2. Keeping Their Feet on the Ground
Conversely, if you’re a best friend, you’ve definitely also had to knock your bestie down a couple notches when they get a little too full of themselves. Sometimes you have to tell them to let a little air out of their overinflated ego and give them the truth as it is. It is all too easy to get used to yourself the way you are now and forget or just plain ignore that you still have a lot to work on.
That’s what a best friend is for. They’re gonna let you know that sure, your selfie skills are impeccable, but you’d be even better at them if you didn’t have to spend fifteen minutes finding the least messy corner of your room to take them in. And yeah, you’ve been really on top of your homework, but why is your mom calling them in the middle of their calc class to ask why you haven’t been answering?
Best friends are the mirror that you have to look into after having fun with all your filters and edits and effects. They’re going to reflect back to who you really are, and that’s something so precious and so important, even when it’s a harsh realization.
3. Doing the Small, Dumb Things
Your bestie is the person you call when you have no plans on a Tuesday night. They’re not going to expect grand ideas on how to spend your burning youth. They’re just going to chill with you as you walk around Walmart at five in the morning because you just finished a paper and you feel like if you stay in your dorm for one more moment, your head will explode. They’re going to try that new Chinese restaurant with you and not be mad when the food takes a little long because you guys were so busy picking apart the silly show on TV that you didn’t even notice. And that’s life. It’s not really those grand ideas and gestures and events that everyone wants and looks forwards to. That’s like, 10% of your life. The other 90% is just you, on the couch with your best friends, wondering if 2:00 AM is too late/early to eat whipped cream straight out of the can. Your best friend is the person you decide to spend the boring bits of life with because, with them, you’re never really bored.
So, I hope you guys recognized a little something of your own life experiences in here, and it wasn’t just me accidentally revealing what weirdos me and my friends are. But even if none of the things we do sound exactly like you and your friends, that’s totally fine.
It may look different for you, but I’m still pretty sure that you and your squad, in one way or another, support each other and enjoy the simple things of life the way life was meant to be enjoyed. Together.