We all want to be that good friend who stops whatever they’re doing, changes into their superhero attire and goes breaking down the door to the room their best friend is stationed in.
Though we all want to, the reality is, we shouldn’t always. It sounds a little harsh, I know. This is something that I am working on as I type this article.
I have this tendency to want to care for, comfort and nurture people (sounds like all women). That isn’t the “problem,” though. The trouble comes when you are devoting so much of your time to other people that you begin to neglect yourself.
You’re just as human as the person you’re always rushing in to save. You need as much attention and care as they do.
Here are four nice ways that you could set time apart to take care of yourself:
Go for a walk
Aren’t you glad I didn’t say run? Phew.
Just go out and enjoy nature, take a little stroll through the neighborhood. It’s good for your body and it just gives you some alone time to think.
Journal
Journaling doesn’t have to be all unicorns and rainbows. You could journal about that guy you like, highs and lows of your day, problems that you may be having, or goals. It’s just a safe way to express thoughts and emotions without having to expose your inner self with people.
Read a good book
I hear people say that reading just “isn’t for them,” (whatever that means). My theory is that if you find an author or genre that you connect with, then you can find a good book. Read something that is relatable and draws you in. Reading, for me, could be used as an escape. It gives you the opportunity to see things in a different perspective.
Learn how to say “No”
I agree, it’s far easier said than done. You don’t have to be rude or disrespectful about declining. A good friend should understand that you can’t and won’t always tend to their every need. If you don’t give a definite “no,” people assume that you are saying yes.
Ultimately, people pleasing will leave you unhappy and drained in almost any and every way possible- mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. In no way am I saying to reject your friends because I understand that sometimes we need someone, but you should set firm boundaries.
My mentor always told me, “It’s great that you want to care of others, but don’t forget to take of yourself in the process.”