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Adulting 101: Navigating Academia, Career Aspirations, and Personal Growth

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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Rutgers chapter.

With the semester coming to an end, I find myself reflecting on the last few months of my college life.

Let me start by introducing myself: my name is Jenna Park. I am a third-year student at Rutgers University, double majoring in Journalism & Media Studies and Sociology, with a minor in Korean. Juggling academics, three jobs (two off-campus, one on-campus), and being Co-President at Her Campus Rutgers has been a humbling journey.

As college students, many of us often find ourselves caught up in the whirlwind of trying to make sense of various aspects of our lives. From navigating the vibrant social scene, filled with weekly frat parties, to managing personal relationships—whether you’re in a committed relationship or entangled in family matters—and diving into the early stages of our work and career pursuits, which include juggling part-time jobs and internships, it can be a lot to handle. Balancing these facets is no small challenge, and as the prospect of adulthood looms closer, the pressure to have everything sorted out can become overwhelming.

But here’s the real talk—I want you to know that it’s absolutely okay not to have every detail of your life mapped out. There’s no fixed timeline dictating what you should or shouldn’t be doing at this point. With that in mind, let me share some valuable lessons I’ve picked up along my journey over the past few years:

Re-Evaluate Your Priorities

I’ve learned the hard way that prioritizing is essential. In the past, I often succumbed to peer pressure, harbored a people-pleaser mentality, and jeopardized my well-being for the sake of those around me. The lesson? It’s okay to say no and prioritize what truly matters.

Going into the fall semester, I knew I was entering a storm of responsibilities, so I took a proactive approach. I sat down and listed out my priorities – work, classes, friendships, family, and extracurriculars – meticulously arranging them in order of importance. This simple act became my compass, guiding me through the semester’s chaos.

Knowing my priorities brought a sense of inner peace. It was like having a roadmap, allowing me to navigate through the semester with a clear sense of direction. I wasn’t constantly second-guessing my choices; I had a blueprint for what truly mattered.

Time is precious and boundaries are essential. Prioritizing isn’t just about tasks; it extends to relationships. The reality is that if a friend wanted to hang out, we would be able to make it work. It might be hard trying to find a day/time that works for both of us, but that’s why planning ahead of time is so important.

By understanding what mattered most, I could invest the right amount of time and energy into friendships, family bonds, and professional connections. This not only strengthened my relationships but also prevented burnout from spreading myself too thin.

Quality over quantity

My social life took a hit this semester, but I recognized it’s about quality over quantity. Real friends get the struggle and don’t mind rain checks.

Building on the importance of prioritizing, one of the most profound lessons I’ve learned involves the ebb and flow of friendships. As time became a limited resource, I found myself having to make choices about where to invest my emotional energy, which inevitably led to changes in my social circle.

With a packed schedule, socializing took a backseat, and I had to be selective about the relationships I nurtured. The consequence? I lost touch with many friends, and our connections became strained. This shift brought both pain and a surprising revelation.

The hard truth: not every connection was built to withstand the test of time and distance. Those friends who drifted away once I stopped initiating contact were, in reality, superficial connections that couldn’t endure.

Amidst the loss, however, emerged the silver lining of authentic and genuine friendships. Those who understood the constraints on my time and didn’t hold it against me became invaluable. These were the friends who weathered the storm with me.

The most valuable lesson? Letting go of friendships wasn’t a failure but rather a part of my evolving journey. It’s about acknowledging the changing dynamics, accepting it with grace, and understanding that not every connection is meant to last forever.

Navigating the complexities of evolving friendships is a journey of self-discovery. Embrace the pain, celebrate the authenticity, and focus your energy on connections that align with your priorities. It’s not about the quantity of friends but the quality of connections that endure.

The Essentials: Self-Care
  • Adequate Sleep: Prioritizing sleep is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. I often underestimated its importance which only resulted in massive headaches and lack of energy throughout my busy weeks. The lesson? A well-rested mind is a more productive mind.
  • Brain-Fueling Nutrition: Your brain needs good fuel. I’ll admit, I’ve had my fair share of junk food binges after coming home from a long day. When you don’t feel like cooking a meal but you’re starving, it’s easier to fall into the cycle of reaching for the snacks in your pantry. But what I can attest to is that when you eat a healthy and filling meal in the morning, your energy levels are visibly different. My recommendation? Meal prep the weekend before and opt for healthy carbs to boost your energy in the mornings!
  • Step Outside and Breath: In all honesty, there have been days when I didn’t step outside at all (besides the commute to work or class). Fresh air does wonders for your mental health. Even if it’s a short stroll during your lunch break, or between your classes, make sure to let your mind rest. Get some sunlight, listen to your favorite playlist and vibe.
  • Journaling Therapy: If I had to choose one thing that has been my holy grail this semester, it would be my journal. I carry my journal in my backpack, so even during my commutes to work or if I have extra time to spare in between my classes, I’ll pick up my pen and start journaling. This helps organize my thoughts and clear my mind of all negative energy and the chaos of the day. Don’t neglect the therapeutic power of journaling. Pen down your feelings; it’s a form of self-care that costs nothing.
Jenna Park is a current junior at Rutgers University-New Brunswick double majoring in Journalism & Media Studies and Sociology with a minor in Korean. She enjoys outdoor activities and takes photographs during her free time.