Being in my 20s has been fun, full of exploring new things and making my own decisions— but it hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows. Unfortunately, being a twenty-something comes with many societal expectations: getting married, having kids, and getting a job. Everyone in their 20s experiences this quarter-life crisis of trying to ‘have it all figured out’. But based on my experience so far, you don’t need to have it all together, and your 20s are a journey of figuring yourself out.
I’m 25 years old and over the past 5 years, I’ve been through so many ups and downs. I had a lot of worries that I was ‘falling behind’ because I’m unmarried, unemployed and I still live with my family. To make matters even more complicated, after 7 years in school, I decided I didn’t want to pursue a degree in marketing anymore. I compare myself to my cousins and my friends who I feel have ‘succeeded’ and have relationships, dream careers, and degrees. Every time I think about all of this, I feel like I have nothing to bring to the table and I don’t have an exact plan on what I want to do yet, or I’m still drafting it. I also feel like I disappointed my parents that I haven’t found work or earned enough to move out. But I also realize that this is okay and along the journey of being a twenty-something, I found things that I love doing and I’m fine with being where I am right now. There’s a writer I read about who shares this incredible quote about self-acceptance in your 20s: “You are more creative and feel more motivated when your self-worth isn’t based on the number of times you’ve gone around the sun.”
For people in their 20s, the best thing to remember is that you have time and that there are no wrong ways of living your life. You could do many things to keep yourself calm in finding your path.
Plan On Your Goals
One thing to do is to focus on your goals and make them manageable so that it’s easy to keep yourself accountable. This could be a goal to get a job, work on your finances, or build a new skill. What can help to make these goals is to start with about 1-3 small daily goals to work on so that you can achieve progress every day. If you’re making monthly or yearly goals, you can make a vision board, displaying visuals of what you’re working towards (you can make it as a physical poster or on Canva for your devices).
It’s Okay to Make Mistakes
You should also accept that you will make mistakes and that’s part of the process. The 20s are a time for you to experiment with trial and error and find what works for you. It’s impossible to avoid failing and trying not to fail or striving for perfection won’t work and will keep you scared to go for what you want.
Watch Your Social Media Consumption
Social media can be detrimental to your mind if you see posts or influencers who make you feel inadequate, leading to self-comparison. Monitor the content you see and unfollow anyone who makes you feel unhappy with yourself.
Love and Take Care of Yourself
The last thing to take away is that you just need to appreciate yourself, where you are, and the life that you want, not the life you should have. This means that you should work on your physical and mental health, spend time with people who care about you, and enjoy the things that you love doing. To love yourself fully, you shouldn’t focus on what other people are doing in their lives and just focus on yours.
The 20s are a time for exploring what you love and figuring out what you don’t, you are allowed to fail at certain things and change where your path goes. When people say that the clock is ticking, it’s not true and you still have many years to live. During this period of your life, it’s good to take care of yourself, make memories, and go after your personal goals and dreams.