Let’s talk about the elephant in the room. It’s me. I am the odd one in the room, almost always. At least in my mind.
This past year, I have been hearing so much about imposter syndrome. It is something that I have always felt but did not really have words for. Once I heard about it the first time, from the current self-help podcast I had been stuck on, I began to see it pop up everywhere. I saw mentions of it on Twitter, in presentations that I attended, and just had it come up in conversation. There is something so powerful about putting a name to a feeling and when you do, it is almost like you cannot escape what you have discovered.
I have a close friend that just won a major award that came with a lot of new responsibilities and recognition. She called me a couple of weeks ago to tell me about the experience, and the thing that she just kept saying over and over is that she “didn’t belong” and that she was “an imposter” in this new role that she had been cast in. However, the thing is, she does belong in that role. She fits in that role probably more than anyone that I have ever known fits into the role that they have been given. And in my own experience, I feel that too. As a student teacher, I constantly feel unworthy of the role and responsibilities I have been given. I feel like I have no idea what I am doing, and am often tempted to sit back and let my Co-Op teacher take over, releasing my responsibility to them.
That’s what imposter syndrome does. It makes you feel like you don’t belong, even if you do. It crushes you in societal standards and envelopes you in a blanket of inferiority. It is a trick that your brain pulls on you, making you believe that you are unworthy of what you have been given, or where you have been placed.
So, what do we do about it? I say, use it to your advantage. You see, self-doubt and imposter syndrome don’t change how capable and prepared you are, it just makes you think that you are less so. The more worried you are about being inferior, the more you over-prepare. The more that you over-prepare, the more that you will shine when it comes time to perform in whatever role you are in. This also helps you to imagine worst-case scenarios, when you finally do run into obstacles, you have most likely already experienced them in your overly hyped, negative self-talk spirals. Another great way to go about this is to change your mindset. List all of the reasons why you feel like you don’t belong, and then flip the narrative. Explain to yourself why all of those things are not true. Or even better yet, embrace the imposter syndrome. When someone says you’re unworthy, say “I know, but I’m here anyway.”
One of my favorite activists tweeted this a couple of days ago, “Just do it anyway. My answer whenever I am asked about imposter syndrome is to admit that I am an imposter, and I treat it like crashing a wedding, you’re in no, have as much fun as possible, and grab all the cake you can before someone throws you out. Lean in and make it a party”(Jameela Jamil). This quote just shows that there is no stopping it, you are going to feel like that at times. And when you do, just do it anyway. Have fun with it, and when stuff finally hits the fan, at least you got something out of it.