I can’t wait for this semester to be over. (Academically, may I clarify.) The current semester has been my most challenging in college thus far. By how much I complain about my workload to my friends, you’d think I was studying rocket science. Nope- just communications!Â
The primary culprit for my stress has been Biology 101, which I am fulfilling as a required science credit. I took a biology course in high school and thoroughly enjoyed it, so I figured this class would be no different. I was wrong. As soon as I met my college professor for biology, I knew I’d like him. He was an excellent professor who was kind, understanding, and knowledgeable about the subject at hand. Nonetheless, a good professor couldn’t negate that the material simply did not click in my mind. It was nothing like high school.
Biology 101 was my biggest shock at college so far. Never before had I been in a class that sped through content at such a rapid pace. I found that in each lecture, we were covering an average of 50-60 slides in a slideshow. As someone who prefers to take notes by hand, this became almost impossible to keep up with. I find myself struggling simply to copy the words on the screen, let alone process or understand them.Â
In addition to the 90-minute lectures twice a week, I spend an hour each Tuesday at Supplemental Instruction and try to attend my professor’s office hours when they fit into my schedule. This doesn’t even include my personal studying for the subject outside of the class. The bottom line is: this has by far been the most time-consuming subject I have taken in all of my academic career.Â
What was most disheartening to me at first was that despite the hours I dedicated to the subject, I was pulling very average scores on the exams. As a communications student, my bread and butter is papers and projects. This was one of the first classes in college where exams held so much weight, and subsequent pressure.Â
My parents and friends (and even professors) encouraged me to stress less about the class, as it was out of my major. I wasn’t studying to be a biologist. Nonetheless, my bad habit of putting pressure on myself skyrocketed while taking biology. I felt I somehow had to prove to everyone that even as a student who wasn’t in STEM, I was just as smart and competent as a biology or chemistry major.Â
On top of biology, my other courses naturally became more challenging sophomore year. Exams, reports, and essays became a daily occurrence rather than weekly. I began working more at my on-campus job. My social circle shifted, and I missed my hometown friends and family. I felt like I was growing up too fast, and suddenly I just wanted to be a kid again.Â
I wish I could say I found a magic equation or solution to help alleviate the pressures of this semester. The future certainly does look more promising, as I begin small steps toward self-love rather than self-pressure. Each day I remind myself that my worth is not tied to a grade, especially in a course that has nothing to do with my field of study. I will be done with Bio 101 in approximately 5 weeks. Though I am counting down the days, I am also immensely proud of myself. Whether it’s Bio 101, a tough boss, or a relationship conflict, life presents challenges. I have found that how we talk to ourselves through these hardships ultimately can reframe the entire situation, and often provide a glimmer of hope.Â