The “humble brag” is an art form I’ve found difficult to master.
I think that, especially as women, if you do something well or are proud of your accomplishments, you should yell about it from the mountaintops (LinkedIn), but I know this is not easy to do.
This is something that has not been easy for me to follow in my own life. Growing up, I excelled in school very early on (gifted kids, rise up), and was thus expected to do exceptionally well for the rest of my school career with little push from my parents to do so.
I am happy that my parents never really pushed me or reminded me to do my homework (they actually did once and were met with snarkiness at a level previously unknown to mankind) because it allowed me to develop intrinsic motivation to do the best I could at everything I did, a skill which everyone needs in college, but very few actually have.
And, I did!
I have so much to be proud of. I am smart. I am happy with the way I look. I am kind, loving and funny. I am given opportunities because I have proven that I am worth the investment of time and money. I deserve everything that has been given to me.
Those are not easy things for me to say, or at least they haven’t always been.
After coming back from my second service trip to East Kensington, Philadelphia, PA, I realized the great importance of being incredibly grateful for what you have and truly seizing and squeezing the most out of every moment. This includes being overwhelmingly joyful about and grateful for each and every opportunity that falls in my lap.
My life has been really good lately (knock on wood three times), another thing that I do not find easy to say. I have a bad habit of self-sabotaging my personal growth, success and happiness at their peaks, leaving me in a dark place with virtually no way out.
I have been working tirelessly to set myself up for the future recently, and in doing so, have been extended countless opportunities for professional and personal growth, which has really improved and affirmed my self-confidence.
I have my pick of summer jobs, which is truly a dream come true. I have planned a service trip, two weeks at summer camp (as an employee, not a camper), a vacation, an internship, a job at school (hopefully), serving jobs, time with friends and maybe even a music festival!
I recently switched around my living plan for next year, and in doing so, found wonderful friends that already feel like sisters and for whom I am forever grateful.
This year, I have been really focused on growth and personal improvement. I have spent a lot of time re-discovering my faith and finding people to spend time with who I don’t have to hide my faith from. Something I wish that more young people understood is that God is not the enemy, sometimes “the enemy” is your own mind. Mental illness is real and can usually be improved with medication. That’s a scientific fact that I would never dispute, especially after seeing how it’s helped my friends and family feel like themselves again. I must, however, make the case that finding my faith again and strengthening my relationship with God has greatly improved my mental health and outlook on life. I’m not prescribing God or anything like that, but that’s my own experience. The best way I can put this is that God is a rock. In a world in which nothing is promised, not even tomorrow, that stability is rare and soothing, and must be cherished.
I have also worked on honoring myself. Before my second semester of sophomore year, I found myself being sucked into whatever anyone else wanted to do with little consideration for my own desires. That’s no way to live life. Since then, I’ve worked to find new interests and hobbies, surround myself with new people while maintaining old friendships and leave my comfort zone. So far, so good.
I have so much to look forward to, which is something I have tended to dread the idea of rather than actually be excited about.
But, the future holds a lot of opportunity, and, as for right now…everything’s coming up MQ.