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Turning one of my biggest fears into one of my greatest memories

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SBU chapter.

One thing about me, is that I am very afraid of heights.

I do not like being high up, especially when it’s on a bridge, an amusement park ride, etc. In those instances,I don’t feel secure whatsoever. My legs shake, it gets harder to breathe, and I often just have to keep my cool until I am finally returned to ground level.

Due to this fear of heights, being in a plane is something I had never done and really had no intention of doing unless I got to go somewhere cool out of it (cool plane vacation has yet to happen).

For whatever reason, maybe just my sick luck, my grandpa had this fixation on me becoming a pilot. How ironic.

One fateful day, when I was just 13 years old, an opportunity came across my grandpas beloved Facebook page, aviation seminars from a real pilot, at the airport only ten minutes from his house. Immediately, this was forwarded to me, and my mom, to which I said “NO. Absolutely not.”

I was freaking terrified of heights, and they wanted me to go learn how to fly a two person plane with some random guy!? No. No way.

I thought that my pleading was enough, and resumed my typical 13 year old girl behavior in my room for the rest of the evening, scared of going downstairs and getting suckered into random ‘plane man school’.

The next day, I went to school as normal, and when I returned home that day I was delivered the joyous news that I had been signed up ANYWAY, and would start the following weekend. Oh brother.

I had throw-up anxiety almost every day leading up to it, and was shaking in my boots (high top converse) on the way there.

The process was suspiciously quick. All I did was give my name and blink. Then I was buckling my seatbelt in a plane.

Words cannot describe how hard I was clenching down every part of my body that could possibly be clenched down. Shocked I didn’t throw up in that mans plane. He was also a really cool dude with brown leather jacket and aviator glasses and all.

He asked if I was ready. I said no. We took off anyway.

At first I was fighting the urge to scream, but suddenly, it became super fun. It was so cool seeing everything, and he even pointed out where my house would be. I took control and it was actually so terrifyingly amazing that I was flying a plane (with his help of course). The fear turned into a wonder and amazement.

Was I ready to apply to pilot school? No, but I was having a good time. And sorry grandpa, it is still never happening.

It was going swimmingly… some could even say soaringly.. until he told me we were going to do a high climb, and started lowering the plane. I started to get out “Cool what’s a high climb” but only really got until about half of the word “what” before he pulled up and were suddenly going NOSE UP INTO THE AIR. I couldn’t hold my head up. I saw God I think.

For a minute I forgot how to speak, but played it cool. I mean, the guy had aviator sunglasses on and everything, I couldn’t be a weenie.

That heart attack feeling really reminded me I’m alive. I wasn’t scared, I was thrilled. I miss that feeling sometimes.

After some more learning and messing about, I successfully landed the plane. I felt absolutely amazing. I did something I was super afraid of, and I actually had a lot of fun. After that I got to learn a lot of cool things about aviation, the mechanics of the plane itself, and even memorized the aviation alphabet. I got to fly a few more times, and even roped my cousins into it. It was amazing.

Although it was such a huge fear I had to face, in the end it became such a great memory, and something I love to bring up every once in a while like “Oh yeah guys I know how to fly a plane I don’t know if I ever told you!”. It’s a hit in two truths and a lie.

All in all, I am so grateful for the experience even though I was forced, and I use it as a lesson everyday since then that I need to step outside of my comfort in life and just do something. When I have a hard time overcoming, I just remember this instance and think of how I overcame. Now I find myself getting on that insane ride, walking across that ginormous bridge, and many more things I usually would refuse, despite still fearing them.

Face your fears ladies. It might be worth it. <3

S(ierra) L(ima) A(lpha) Y(ankee)!

Audney Burnside is a returning writer for the St. Bonaventure Her Campus chapter. She publishes articles weekly, spanning the topics of music, lifestyle and popular culture. She hopes to further the amazing creativity that her chapter of Her Campus has to share with the world. Audney is currently an academic junior at St. Bonaventure University, studying Public Health in the 3+2 Occupational Therapy Master's program. Audney brings a high degree of campus involvement to the chapter, not only as a member of Her Campus, but also as a peer mentor in Bona Buddies, the Secretary of SBU for Equality, and also as a tutor! Apart from academics, Audney’s life revolves around the music she loves, outdoorsy adventures, and her best friends. Audney is a devoted cat mom and enthusiastic nature explorer, who loves kayaking with her family, takes way too much pride in her recent Taylor Swift concert attendance, and will bring up The Catcher in the Rye at any moment possible.