Did you enjoy pretending to love me? Did you enjoy lying to my face every single day? You claimed you loved me and wanted to spend your life with me, yet you moved on so fast. You found her while we were together, pretending to still love me. Do I have proof you cheated? No, but your behavior after our breakup says it all. We cried for hours in my car, sitting outside your house on that cold night. It was the second time we were having that conversation. You made up so many pathetic excuses: “You are going to college. We won’t see each other as much.” It was an hour drive and I was home every weekend. You were the one who repeatedly canceled plans to “hang out with your friends.” I know you were with your ex. Your friends covered for you or completely ignored my messages, giving me all the information I needed in a silent manner. You weren’t out playing PokĂ©mon Go! or playing video games in your room. You would ghost me for hours and you would turn off your location on purpose. I only started checking your location after I became suspicious. I should have kicked you to the curb sooner. I wasted so much time, energy, and money on you. That year was the worst of my life. Now you are telling your friends and new piece of ass lies about me. I only used you for money and sex? That’s a lie. You were the one who asked me to buy you those gifts. The knife and the games were all your ideas, not mine. I never asked you for anything. Any gift you got me was a trashy Dollar Tree gift. You had a job and spent your money on god knows what, never putting forth the same energy that I did. As for the sex, you know exactly what I went through growing up. You still wanted it whenever and wherever. I wish my parents walked into the basement that first night and kicked you out. And every time after, I wish your mom would have gotten off her ass and came into your room to see what you were doing. That year of my life is gone, and I can never get it back. They say senior year is supposed to be fun and joyous, but you only filled it with false hope and empty promises. You broke up with me in August, right after I started college. I was devastated. I couldn’t get out of bed or eat. I cried for days while my old roommate watched me from the other side of the room, knowing the pain I was in. You called back soon after, begging me to give you a second chance. I thought that was it, that everything would be smooth sailing from there on out. It wasn’t and I should have ended it sooner rather than waste months with you again. November brought the freedom I so desperately needed. I should had sought out that freedom long before we split up for the second time. Â
I’m glad we aren’t together anymore. Your new girlfriend seems to make you happy. She’s messaged me, asking about you, about if you cheated, about if you hurt me in any way. She also asked why I always made you have sex and spend money on me. I’m glad you are filling her head with lies about me. I was forced to do things when I was younger and know how horrible it feels, so why would I have done it to you? I should have told her everything, about how crappy of a boyfriend you were, how you lied about everything, and how you didn’t even care about me. I didn’t. I’m not like you. We broke up and the past is past. I’m not going to talk to any of your friends, your current girlfriends, or even our shared friends about you. I blocked you, her, and all your friends so they wouldn’t try to get dirt on me because you are just the kind of scum who would spread any little detail about me. Â
Taking back the pocketknife was the best decision I ever made. The look of pure hatred and anger you had when I demanded you give me back the one thing you loved the most brought me so much joy. I threw it away, too. You ripped out my heart, so I ripped out yours and threw it away. Screw you. I hope you enjoy the crappy bed you made for yourself. Â