There comes a point in everyone’s Santa Clara career when they make the transition from on-campus caterpillar to off-campus butterfly. It is the time when you graduate from dorm life and embrace the riveting unknown that is off-campus life. It is an exciting time filled with decisions around roommates, location, and a house name.
Now each decision must not be taken lightly, as it can affect your overall quality of life. Pick a wrong roommate and you better sleep with one eye open. If you end up on the dark side, you might as well consider yourself a commuter. And if you don’t have a house name that rolls off the tongue in such a way that can be easily remembered, you’re practically irrelevant to the entire social scene.
Any young, naive, freshman or sophomore cannot wait to drop those dreaded Swig keys like a hot tamale. But let me tell you, having your bills included in tuition and a guaranteed meal at any time of the day are luxuries that I miss constantly. Here are some typical expectations of living off campus and the realities that make off-campus life one sizzling hot mess:
Cooking for yourself
Expectation: “I am so excited to cook for myself! I have like 80 bookmarked Pinterest recipes. I can go grocery shopping every Sunday and plan my meals for the entire week. Maybe we can even plan weekly house dinners when we all cook for each other!”
Reality: “I went grocery shopping today. I came home with two avocados and some shampoo. Anyone want to order a pizza?”
Not having to eat Benson anymore
Expectation: “It’s going to be great to have more OPTIONS. Benson food is so boring, they make everything from the same three ingredients.”
Reality: **opens fridge: finds a half-empty Gatorade and a moldy cheese stick** “WHO DO WE KNOW THAT CAN BUY US BENSON???????????”
Naming your house
Expectation: “We are going to give our house a really cool and creative new name even if it’s already been named from last year. Everyone will love our new house name and remember it.”
Reality: **changes name every week**
“What’s your house called?” “It’s Palace!” “Where’s that?”
Next week…. “It’s Brick House!” “Is that the one on Alviso?”
And after that… “It’s Cheeto House!” “That’s a dumb name”
And after that…. “It’s the one across the street from DG by 711.” “Ohh yeah I know where that is!”
But your house name can’t be 10 words, so back to the drawing board it is.
Your daily routine
Expectation: “I’m going to go to bed early every night and wake up early to do yoga at 7AM before class.”
Reality: **Mindlessly social media stalking everyone you know, talking to roommates on couch until 3AM after your second 711 run of the night, pressing snooze for an hour the next morning before you actually wake up**
Overall house cleanliness
Expectation: “We are going to have a chore chart because it’s really important to us that the house stays clean.”
Reality: “Can someone bring me toilet paper? Why is there a 10-foot pile of laundry in the hall? Whose turn is it to take out the trash? Can Liliana come everyday?”
House location
Expectation: “We picked the location based on safety and proximity to campus.”
Reality: We live on the same street as 711. You do the math.
Yes it is a glorious time to leave behind shower shoes and shared bathrooms but as a wise man once said, “with great fun comes great responsibility.” The reality is your expectations of living off-campus may in fact be no reality at all.
Photo Source: www.theclara.co