September is National Suicide Prevention/Awareness month—an entire month dedicated towards the prevention, awareness and education of suicide. It is a time where those who have stories and experiences with suicide can come forward and share them with the hopes of encouraging and strengthening others like themselves. It is also a time where people, such as myself, can become more educated on the topic of suicide.
There is a plethora of harsh and cruel stigmas that are wrongfully attached to suicide and those who struggle with mental illnesses in general. This is part of the reason why National Suicide Prevention/Awareness month is so vital. People’s voices deserve to be heard. Those individuals struggling with mental illnesses and suicidal thoughts are in fact not stereotypes, and those of us who are friends, family members, and significant others need to be enlightened on the do’s and don’ts when caring for suicidal loved ones.
Recently, I reached out to a longtime friend of mine, Courtney Bradley—a senior psychology major at Stephen F. Austin State University who has been a continuous advocate for mental health — and asked her a few questions concerning the topics of suicide prevention, the stigmas surrounding it, and healthy ways to help suicidal/mentally ill loved ones.
A: First, tell me a little bit about what suicide prevention/awareness means to you? Why do you feel this topic is so important?
C: “Suicide prevention means more than just saving lives to me. It is about healing and reviving. It is about being someone else’s strength and refuge. Suicide awareness is what helps us get there. It educates us and prepares us to be there for those who need every bit of compassion we have left to give.”
A: What, in your opinion, are the worst stigma’s/stereotypes of suicide? What are those who are less educated on suicide get wrong/misconstrue?
C: “Common stigmas: People who are suicidal are cowards or attention seeking. They are selfish, you should only “check in”, those who are survivors of suicide loss are to blame for the death, and that suicide attempt survivors “cry wolf.” These are all incredibly sickening stigmas that we work hard to eradicate. Those who are experiencing suicidal ideation are experiencing unimaginable pain, and I personally think that most people feed into these stigmas which results in less awareness.”
A: What are some healthy and effective things one, say a family member, friend, or significant other, can either say or do when dealing with a loved one who may be experiencing suicidal thoughts/tendencies? How can outsiders help while remaining sensitive to their loved one’s emotions and needs?
C: “My personal advice is to always provide companionship and compassion. Never EVER let anyone you feel like or know of going through suicidal thoughts be alone or think that they are alone. If you can’t relate, you must be sure to genuinely be there physically and emotionally for them. One simple “you okay?” check in is not enough. You must put forth the extra step and go the extra miles to help your loved one come out of this deep, dark space. No matter how “absurd” their thoughts are to you, do not make it about yourself and others. They are centered around their own sorrow so make it about their sorrow and make it a mission to get them to peace no matter what. Make them feel validated, let them know they are never a burden, and ADVOCATE TO GET THEM PROFESSIONAL HELP!”
A: What would you say could be or is an effective way to prevent a suicide? How can society prevent the rates of suicide from steadily rising?
C: “I do not have an answer for this because I am not *yet* a professional and honestly I am not sure if professionals even have this answer. Suicides are a recurring thing, and each case, just like any other mental illness, is different for everyone. We have the power to save at least one life just by listening to someone. We have the power to lift someone up just by being kind and making sure our loved ones are reassured that we care. Doing these things and going the extra mile makes all the difference along with destroying the stigma surrounding it.”
A: Personally, as a child I had very complex thoughts regarding suicide. I truly didn’t understand it and attending a Baptist church certainly didn’t help. I was led to believe that suicide was selfish and that one would “go to Hell” if they were to commit suicide. What are your thoughts on how the church/religion views suicide? How do we debunk these harmful stigmas for younger people while they are still young and impressionable?
C: “I have personally experienced those same complex thoughts because of the same stigmas. Personally, I am religious, and I did not quite understand why someone would say that about something that pretty much is out of our control. Intrusive thoughts are truly not our own, and I think that if the church had a better understanding of what suicide entails psychologically, physically, and even spiritually; they would approach it differently. It all starts with knowledge and then positive action.”
A: I experienced my first encounter with the topic of suicide back when I was in the third grade. Do you have a direct connection with suicide? Has this topic ever affected your life in a personal way?
C: “I have a direct connection with suicide and indirect connections. The direct connection I have is what put the passion in my heart to move forward in the mental health field. These experiences helped me realize that this is something way bigger than just a check in. The indirect affects ignited the passion I have. It gave me a drive to potentially guide people out of the lowest place imaginable or even just sit there with them…because it is a place that I am also familiar with.”
A: What ways have you contributed to raising awareness for suicide prevention? How do you plan on contributing to this topic in the future?
C: “In my own way I try to share helpful resources on my social media because that is where I can reach the most people. The more information I find that is beneficial, the more I share at any given time. I understand this topic can be heavy for some, but I still make sure this dialogue does not die starting with my friends and family. I also make sure to tackle or acknowledge suicide awareness in my meetings with BMHO [Black Mental Health Organization cofounded by Courtney at SFA in September 2019]. I want to do everything I can in the future to contribute to this topic whether it be through my profession or just sharing my own story. I want to keep this conversation going so that we can prevent the:
– 2nd leading cause of death in those ages 10-34 (National Institute of Mental Health or NIMH)
-10th leading cause of death in the U.S. (American Foundation of Suicide Prevention or AFSP)
-the 18th leading cause of death in the world (World Health Organization or WHO)
, which is in fact, suicide.”
A: Final thoughts, advice, and/or suggestions regarding suicide prevention/awareness?
C: “Do not take this lightly. We often hear the word “suicide” and think of tragedy. Our hearts grow heavy when it’s too late but when we hear the word “suicidal” it is selfish and attention seeking. Let’s keep the same energy for both. Don’t let your heart grow heavy once we see “suicide” or “committed suicide” because there is still hope in “suicidal”, and that’s your opportunity to be someone else’s light. Take care of your mental health along with your physical health because they are both equally important!”
If you, or anyone you know, may be suffering from a mental illness or suicidal thoughts, below is the website and number to a helpful resource:
National Suicide Prevention Hotline: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ and 1-800-273-8255
I would like to give a special thanks to Courtney for taking the time to share her knowledge and passionate feelings regarding this topic. If you are interested in hearing more from her and/or would like to see more advocation for mental health on your timeline, you can follow Courtney and BMHO on these social media platforms below:
Twitter: @chillxxcourt
Instagram: @chillxcourt
BMHO Twitter: @BMHO19
BMHO Instagram: @bmho19