A couple weeks ago I was asked what I thought is perceived in today’s world as a woman’s role in society.
At the time, I mumbled something about society telling women to stay in the house or something along those lines because, hey I’m sorry, I’m not always great at giving in-depth answers on-the-spot! However, after letting the question marinate for a couple weeks, I have more to say:
On the surface, it seems that women are allowed to be anything now. It might be harder, we might make less money for the same job as a man, and we might have to think about things like being “likeable”, but we can be anything (except President apparently… yes I’m still bitter). There are two things you are expected to be eventually though: a wife and a mother. The problem is that not all of us want that- and that should be okay.
It’s not that I’m totally opposed to being those things, but they just aren’t what I mainly aim to be in life and they never have been. There is so much I want to accomplish in my life before (and if) I decide to do those things. Besides, at this point in my life I’m basically Chandler Bing:
Usually when you tell someone that you don’t see yourself ever wanting kids, they say, “You’ll change your mind”. But what if I don’t? I should be allowed not to want kids without people questioning my potential happiness. Women can be happy on their own.
Don’t tell me that I have to live my life a certain way to be happy. Being a wife and a mother is not my only possible purpose in life. There is so much I can do to make the world a better place and being those things is not the only way I can find purpose and happiness in my life.
The interesting thing about these roles that have been established for so long is that women seem to be the main ones perpetrating them. It’s women who tell me I’ll change my mind about having kids. Maybe I will, but that’s not for anyone to say except for me.
So if you’re a woman, think twice about questioning someone else’s choices. That’s a big part of what feminism is- giving women the choices to be who they want to be in life. The idea that women can only be happy with a husband and children is an outdated sentiment that needs to be thrown out. When we say that women can be anything, it should also mean that they don’t have to be anything either (i.e. that they don’t have to fill any roles).