There’s something both exciting and a little unsettling about living alone. On one hand, it’s complete freedom—your space, your rules, no one around to question why you’re eating Hot Cheetos for dinner. But on the other, it’s just you. No background noise of family conversations, no one waiting for you to get home, and sometimes, the quiet can feel too quiet.
I won’t lie—at first, I didn’t know what to do with all the silence. Back home, there was always something happening. My mom calling from another room, my sisters playing music, my family gathering around the kitchen, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. But college, especially in upstate New York where the winters make everything feel even quieter, is a different experience. And yet, I’ve learned that being alone doesn’t have to mean feeling lonely. It’s all about how you create your space and fill your time.
Learning to Enjoy Your Own Company
One of the biggest shifts was realizing that I don’t need to constantly be around people to feel good. I started treating alone time as something intentional, not just an absence of company. I take myself on coffee runs, play music while getting ready (even if it’s just for class), and spend time journaling or watching my favorite movies. Small things like these remind me that solitude isn’t a bad thing, it’s a chance to reconnect with myself.
Filling the Silence
It’s strange how much I miss simple background noise. So now, I create my own. I call my family even if we don’t have much to talk about, let a show play while I do homework, or listen to music just to make my space feel alive. It’s not the same as home, but it makes everything feel a little warmer.
Putting Yourself Out There
I had to lose the fear of making new friends. At first, it felt intimidating—everyone already seemed to have their group, and I wasn’t sure where I fit in. But the truth is, everyone is figuring it out. I started saying yes to things, joining clubs, and actually showing up to events instead of talking myself out of them. Skidmore has so many ways to connect with people, whether it’s a club that aligns with your passions or a random event with free food (because let’s be honest, we’re all showing up for the snacks).
Making Campus Feel Like Home
One of the best ways I’ve avoided feeling lonely is by making my environment feel familiar. I take fun classes just for me—ones that make my schedule more exciting rather than just piling on requirements. I visit my professors during office hours (which, by the way, is way less intimidating than it sounds) and use campus resources because, let’s be real, they exist for a reason. Whether it’s a study space, a student-led event, or even therapy sessions on campus, there’s always something going on. You just have to take the first step.
Creating a Routine That Feels Good
No one is there to remind me to go outside, eat a real meal, or take breaks, so I’ve had to build little habits that keep me grounded. I try to get some fresh air when the weather allows, make my bed most mornings (still a work in progress), and cook something decent every now and then. Creating a routine gives my days more structure and makes my space feel more like mine.
Appreciating the Independence
At the end of the day, living alone is something I’ve learned to appreciate. I get to create my own space, make my own choices, and figure out what works for me. There are moments when I miss the constant energy of home, but there’s also something really nice about knowing that I can handle being on my own.
So, if you ever feel lonely while living alone, just remember—you’re not really alone. You have yourself, your music, your routines, your community, and the people who love you, even if they’re miles away.
And when all else fails? A long FaceTime call always helps.