There’s something magical about the holidays, don’t you think? The season feels warm and inviting thanks to the sparkling lights, the aroma of home-cooked food, and the laughter of family. If we’re being completely honest, though, that “magic” doesn’t just happen. Mothers, grandmothers, aunts, and sisters are among the women who put in endless effort to make the season come to life behind every beautifully wrapped gift, every festive meal, and every treasured family custom. The holidays are held together by their effort, which is generally unappreciated. It’s time to honor and value the job they do throughout the year, not just during the holidays.
The Hidden Labor of the Holidays
I remember how my grandma, aunt, and mother would gather together every Thanksgiving to make something special. Tarts baking in the oven, the aroma of roasting turkey, and the sounds of women chatting as they moved between the dining room, the living room, and the kitchen would fill the house. Nobody needed to ask as to who was doing what. While I would be stirring something on the stove and my aunt would be chopping veggies, my mom would be organizing the meal and making sure everything turned out just right. In between, she would share anecdotes from her own childhood and talk about whatever gossip was going on at the time. How could they manage their careers, take care of their own families, and kept everything else in order while doing all of this?
It was more than just food. It was about love and the custom of ensuring that everyone felt cared for, seen, and included. None of it was “officially” acknowledged as laborous. It was just what women did. It wasn’t a paid profession, was it? They frequently sacrificed their own time and energy to keep the family together, make memories, and ensure that everything was perfect.
The Emotional Labor
My mother was the one who made sure that everyone was just right, not just the food or the decorations. She was able to tell when someone was worried or feeling excluded and would discreetly check in, lending a sympathetic ear or a moment of consolation. Even if it meant putting her own needs last, she was always the one monitoring everyone else’s. This is the unseen emotional work that women often do without realizing it. Cooking and cleaning aren’t the only things involved. It’s the emotional strain of juggling everyone’s demands, the need to make every second seem “perfect,” and the small but frequently overlooked sacrifices. I will always remember my mother’s smile while we were all seated around the table, having a good time and laughing. However, I was also aware that she had likely been working nonstop to make it happen at that point.
Women as the Keepers of Tradition
My grandma instilled in us the importance of cherishing the time spent at the table and the act of eating meals with those you care about. It was more than just food. It has to do with the connection. It was about transferring a sense of family, tradition, and belonging that went beyond a simple dish. It would be my aunt’s responsibility to make sure the table was perfectly arranged, the candles were lit, and the background music was playing. A meal was elevated to a special occasion by these minor nuances. Even though no one ever asked her to do anything, it was assumed that she was making this moment one to remember, so no one even needed to say “thank you.”
And nobody acknowledges it. It’s simply an expectation of the job. “Who’s taking care of all this behind the scenes?” is a question we don’t often consider. Because the answer is often: women
Why We Need to Acknowledge This Work
It dawned on me then how much work goes into making these moments happen, how much women sacrifice to make the holidays special. And it’s not just about one day. I’m hoping that this year, we can all take a moment to truly appreciate the mothers, grandmothers, aunts, sisters, and friends that make the holidays so memorable. Let’s make sure they receive the love and thanks they so richly deserve, whether that means helping out in the kitchen, wrapping presents, or simply expressing gratitude for their hard work.
Thank the women. Because a store or a beautifully laid table cannot bring the magic of the holidays. The women are the ones that make it year after year with their hands, their hearts, and their unwavering dedication to bringing joy to the season.