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Everything “Sex and the City” Taught Me About Friendship Green Flags

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SLU chapter.

Warning: Spoiler’s Alert

I’ve been working my way through all six seasons of the rom-com show “Sex and the City.” It’s an extravagant plot about four ladies who are best friends navigating life and relationships in the Big Apple. From the over-the-top fashion to the heart-wrenching life lesson moments at the end of each episode, this show has me and three of my best friends hooked.

While this show revolves heavily on relationships with men (and the occasional woman), the biggest takeaway I have had from binging this series the past year is the emphasis on the importance of female relationships. 

Here are all the things I’ve learned from the best friends of Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda and Samantha.

  1. Best friends are brutally honest. These ladies know how to tell it straight to their friends. When one of the women is in a tough situation, they often all have different, strong opinions on the situation. For instance, when Carrie cheats on Aidan with Big, even the most sexually promiscuous of the friends, Samantha, tells Carrier straight-up that she needs to stop chasing the truth.
  2. Best friends support the things you love even if they don’t love those same things. Miranda is a lawyer. Charlotte wants to be a wife and stay-at-home mother. Carrie is the relationship type, and Samantha can’t be caught in a relationship longer than a week. Nonetheless, when one of the friends is passionate about a career, life-choice or even a fashion accessory, the rest of the ladies are right there with her. When Charlotte chose to quit her job, the other women played devil’s advocate for awhile but ultimately supported her.
  3. Best friends make time for you. Almost every episode features a scene with the four besties huddled around morning breakfast, often hungover and recapping their latest stories about men. This tradition highlights the amount of time these busy gals spend with each other and the importance of their rituals like the morning breakfast recap.
  4. Best friends know how to apologize. Although Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda and Samantha are all set in their own ways most of the time, they know when they have taken things too far. They understand the signs they have hurt a friend and work to make it better. When Miranda fell at her apartment and had no one to help, she called Carrie. Since Carrie was with her boyfriend Aidan, she sent Aidan to the rescue. Not only was Miranda humiliated that a man saw her in that state, she was furious that Carrie wouldn’t prioritize coming to her aid. Miranda told Carrie how she felt, and Carrie was able to make it up to Miranda, no grudges held.
  5. Best friends will get glammed up with you. The most iconic moments in the “Sex and the City” series are when all four ladies are out on the town wreaking havoc. They know how to have a night out and do it in style from Miranda’s fiery red hair to Carrie’s boho-chic sets to Charlotte’s yacht-urban mashups. And they always, of course, do it all with a martini or cosmo in hand.
  6. Lastly, best friends always show up. When Miranda’s mother unexpectedly died, all of the girls traveled to be there for her, even though it wasn’t Samantha’s “thing.” They always answer middle-of-the-night phone calls and are a shoulder to cry on and hand to hold. Through tension and excitement, they’re in it together through it all.

Next time you’re having a girls night in or are simply on a walk with your bestie, appreciate all the things you do for each other and maybe let her know out loud. If there’s one thing us women can do in this life that comes naturally, it’s support each other.

Lucy is a senior at Saint Louis University studying occupational therapy. In her free time—if she has any—you may find her curating music for her DJ gig with KSLU radio, shooting hoops at the Rec Center, or drinking a fun little beverage. Her writing is like her life: sporadic, passionate, full of energy, and a bit all over the place.