Growing up as a weird kid was a blessing in disguise, even though I didn’t realize it while in my peak era of weirdness.
Let me set the scene for you: sixth grade, braces, glasses, a signature hairstyle, a chronically online kid. Do I have to say anymore? My friends and I hyperfixated on internet celebrities and kept up with current trends to the best of our 12-year-old abilities. Not many other kids in our grade had the same interests as we did, so we kept to our small group. As a result, we were typecasted as the “weird kids.” Surprisingly, we were unbothered by this fact. Yes, people made fun of us and few were quick to jump to befriend us, but being a kid and finding enjoyment in whatever we wanted was more fulfilling than trying to fit in with everyone else.
However, as life got more complicated and I grew older, not caring about other people’s opinions became more difficult. I lost sight of the value of my own self worth and slowly, I began to care about what others thought of me and my true personality went into hibernation. I suddenly couldn’t understand why people called me annoying or didn’t like me. It was hard, especially in high school, when everyone around me had expectations for how to act or behave. When you didn’t agree with the majority or stood out with confidence, you were a target waiting to be torn down. Luckily, with every year that passed, I realized that being authentic, even if it is considered “weird” to other people, is more fulfilling than trying to bend backwards to appease people who at the end of the day don’t care.
I am fortunate enough to have a friendship that has lasted from grade school to college. This has allowed us the unique pleasure of reminiscing on our past together. Just the other day, I mentioned to her how weird we were in grade school. We recalled the weird, niche things we entertained ourselves with and the odd tendencies we had growing up. And I am not just saying weird as a “quirky” adjective–we were genuinely the most odd kids ever. But looking back, we agreed that we wouldn’t have done anything differently. By being weird kids, we truly lived in the moment and enjoyed the fullness of our childhoods without worrying about what other people thought. It sounds cliche but it is an experience that I hold close to my heart. The lessons I learned as a tween still resonate with me. The most important lesson I learned from this experience was to be unapologetically authentic, and to stand firm even when people would try to tear me down.
Though I didn’t know it then, being the loud, funny, weird girl whose only intention was to make people smile and laugh has built the foundation for how I carry myself today. By moving past expectations people created for me and being myself, I created a foundation to look back on and emulate with pride. From childhood to young adulthood I have always had unadulterated joy in every situation of life. Past, present and future me will always be that weird girl. Is that a negative? Am I ashamed of this? Absolutely not! If you have ever identified with being the “weird kid,” just consider how your unique and individual personality was shaped by who you were growing up. If I wasn’t that weird girl who hyperfixated on Miranda Sings and had a niche fan account back in 2016, I wouldn’t be my banging funny self with an equally banging personality to this day. And you know what? I wouldn’t trade it for the world!