Growing up, I read a lot of magazines like Seventeen and Cosmopolitan. One of my favorite sections were the pages that detailed the latest style predictions or — even better — a style quiz. Fashion was deeply engrained into my identity growing up. I noticed that when I dressed differently, people approached me differently based on the assumptions of whatever style I was wearing that day. If I dressed “edgy,” I was intimidating and unapproachable. If I dressed “classically,” I was educated and sometimes stuck-up. If I dressed “girly,” I was ditzy.
I copied these styles from the magazines I read, not giving them a second thought of how they might affect how I saw myself.
Abby Raffo
It wasn’t until college, where it seemed like everyone was wearing athleisure, that I realized that I didn’t have much of a personal style. I needed to make a change, but it wasn’t until recently that I felt like my style truly reflected who I was. If you’re like me, and you realized that you may or may not have gotten caught up in the idea of being “fashionable” to the point that you didn’t have much of a personal style, here are some ways that I found my style and myself.
Give Away The Unneccesary
If you’re like me, you’ve probably looked at your closet and been overwhelmed by the amount of options available. There were items that I was holding onto for years that I kept, “just in case” I decided that I wanted to wear it. However, despite the sheer amount of options that I had, I kept going back to the same handful of clothes. I think I did this because a lot of times, when I have a lot of options for a single decision, I get anxious to the point where I feel defeated (ever had the feeling that you have “nothing” to wear?).
This is why the first thing that I did when restructuring my wardrobe was give, give, give! I donated a lot of my clothes, so I knew that they would be going to someone who could truly cherish them, and I felt better giving clothes to thrift stores when I thrift so often. At first, I was nervous to let go of the clothes that had been traveling with my wardrobe for so long, but I can tell you now that I donated literally 4 trash bags of clothes like this and I couldn’t tell you what a single article of clothing in that bag was. A good rule of thumb is that if you haven’t worn it in 1-2 years, you probably won’t wear it again (unless it is formalwear). If it’s stained to the point where you can’t get the stain out, it’s time to ditch it, and if you are saving it for when you “lose 15 pounds,” you may want to get rid of that as well. Clothes should be a reflection of who you are, not who you were or think you should be. They should make you feel good about yourself, not remind you that you said you would lose weight.
Gather Ideas for what you like and dislike
This doesn’t have to stick to fashion and clothes! You can also take inspiration from your favorite art pieces and make a note of what textures you think go well in architecture! You also should make a note of what pieces you are throwing out (what fabric it’s made of, it’s color, it’s construction, etc.) to get an idea of what you don’t like. If you are throwing out a bunch of Y2K items because you don’t wear them, don’t make the mistake of buying them again! Also take a look at the clothes that you love wearing and why you love wearing them. Do you love the comfy, cozy feel of your sweatpants? Are you keeping a specific cut of shirt because it makes you look great? These are all things you can pay attention to when buying more clothes for your wardrobe!
No Shopping Sprees
You heard me. Whenever I go on a shopping spree, I don’t really love at least 50% of the clothes that I buy. I just buy them because I’m buying other clothes and I was to “treat myself.” To avoid this, I challenged myself to swear off shopping sprees until I had a good idea of what I liked. In the meantime, I tried to get creative with my new “bare bones” wardrobe and see what new combinations I could try out. I was surprised to find that many of my favorite outfit combinations were created during this time. I was forced to make an expression of myself, but it was a lot easier because I knew that I liked all of the things in my closet. I still thrifted some things here and there, but by and large, I haven’t even really felt the urge to go on a shopping spree since I pushed myself to make do.
No how-to list is perfect, and this one may not apply to everyone. But, I hope you give my unscientific method a chance and let me know how it goes! Good luck to all of the ladies who are trying to find themselves in their wardrobe and to the gals who are constantly recreating themselves (and their wardrobe)!