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Student Advice on How to Find a Decent Guy

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at South Carolina chapter.

You’re typically not supposed to judge a book by it’s cover, but everyone does it without even realizing that they are. It’s the little things that people do that have a lot to say about who they are, and those underestimated trivial details determine whether a guy is worth your time or not. Whether you’re looking for a relationship or just a one-night stand, it’s always important to find a guy that will respect you, and your body.

You’ll find at least one good guy in every place you go, but mostly they’ll be do something productive such as going to the library, running, working out in the gym, etc. Good guys have ambition, standards, and motivation in life other than sleeping with the first girl they encounter at a bar to boost their egos. First impressions are important.

Before pursuing any guy, ask yourself these questions:

What are their intentions when they meet girls in five points?

The “good guy” intentions are those who respect you, and are willing to put your wants over theirs.

 “Well normally I don’t have any intentions, I let the girl determine the intentions, and if I’m interested I’ll go off what she wants to do,” says Michael Allen, a USC junior.

Another USC student says, “I don’t really meet girls in five points, usually just hang out with whatever group I came with and whoever I see downtown that I already know.”

Still, not every guy downtown is innocent. You can be sure that some of them aren’t there for the right reasons. “The sad thing is that I see guys waiting for girls to get wasted beyond comprehension, and take them home. I hate to be the one that has to say that out loud, but that’s what happens. That’s why five points is not the place I want to be,” says another student.

If you’re ever wondering why there are some bad eggs out there, Casey Poole, a USC sophomore has some pretty good ideas: “[Bad guys want to] boost their reputation, ego, and body count.”

On the more comical (but also true?) side, Dylan Burke, a USC freshman says, “[Bad guys are] only trying to bang, and they always have a hat on downtown because its dark and there’s no point other than to look cool, also they are always trying to flex by buying girls drinks.”

How do they present themselves in social situations?

Decent guys are not the guys who are strutting around with their big egos and attracting attention towards themselves. You will have to look just a little bit harder because they are the ones who keep to themselves, stay within their group of friends, and probably won’t approach you. However, the time and effort you take in order to pick out the “good guys” will most likely be worth it.

Not always, but often times, the not-so-good guys love to be the center of the party, causing disruptions, and attracting attention to themselves. Sure, great guys can have fun too, but if someone is showing signs of being shallow and conceited, it might be best to move on. Even worse? If they spend 80 percent of the time saying things that they think you want to hear (to get into your pants of course), you might as well tell them to take a hike. Also hint: they will most likely be wearing snapbacks and their big egos.

Michael Allen, a junior at USC, will tell you “They’re people that are too aggressive and expect too much.”

Another student says to look our for “someone who is arrogant and self-centered.”

What are some green flags? (green = good) 

For all of the negative signs to pick up on, there are also some great characteristics to look for. Keep these in mind the next time you scout the field. 

“I look for guys who have manners such as holding the door open for you, saying please and thank you…you know, the basics, because it’s a starting foundation for a genuine guy. Guys who can’t do the simple things, obviously can’t do anything else decent either,” says Morgan Nichols, a freshman at USC.

Or, as another student put it simply, “A guy that doesn’t just stare at your tits.” 

What are some red flags? (red = bad)

…and of course there are also some bad signs to keep in mind, too. Avoid at all costs.

“Red flags are no eye contact, not really interested in getting to know you, talks about themselves a lot, cocky,” says Ruchi Datta, a USC freshman. “Green flags are the opposite of all of those.”

“COCKINESS. That is the biggest red flag for me,” says freshman, Erin Graham. “You can tell by the way a guy talks to girls or acts around his friends if he sees himself as more superior than others. And I guess an obvious red flag for me at least is when a guy prioritizes partying over anything else and I feel like it’s easy to tell when a guy has goals and ambition or not.” 

Next time you’re thinking about making a move, ask yourself these questions, and maybe you’ll end up snagging a goodie.

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Mariah Diamond

South Carolina

Mariah Diamond is a Retail Management Major at University of South Carolina. 
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SC Contributor

South Carolina