‘It’s the most wonderful time of the year,’’ some may say; the smell of hot chocolate fills the air as the streets are flooded with happy shoppers with their bags hitting you as you try to pass them by. Wherever you are, if you step back and look around, you’ll see the towns shining bright with Christmas decorations in every shop window, building, and tree- and I cannot stand it.
I hate to be a Grinch, but this year, I have found that Christmas time can be quite isolating, especially when you are freshly single. All this Christmas cheer and music playing loud for all to hear, is simply infuriating. As someone who is heartbroken, I’ve grown to hate Christmas. But I have spent enough time hating, so I must change the narrative.
There’s beauty in being single. I guess you learn to spend more time with yourself, and try to figure out what you want from life. There’s no point in sitting and dwelling for months over being disappointed by a man…again. It’s time to find comfort in solitude and heartbreak and change our perspectives.
Shifting your perspective is a difficult thing to do. I think when you are going through heartbreak it can often feel like the whole world has stopped spinning and you just wish a sink hole would swallow you up. However, my friends, who are my support system, have helped me realize that at the end of the day, I am choosing to be upset, locking myself in my bedroom crying whilst my life is passing me by. Instead of mourning the love lost for too long, try and look at the amazing things you already have that make your life so full: amazing friends, a family to come home to this Christmas, the opportunity to study on such a beautiful campus, and, though it may be bold of me to say, the fact that you are upset over someone is something to be grateful for.
I like the idea of finding comfort in solitude, because sometimes we are made out to feel bad for being alone. Why is that? When you are single, it is the only moment in your life where you can dedicate all your time to yourself. It is time to be selfish this Christmas! Personally, I have turned to retail therapy of course and booking to get my hair done. Who said you can’t have a glow-up during winter?
In this whim of Holiday glee, I still catch myself upset. A friend of mine, recently sent me the lyrics to Taylor Swift’s Happiness quoting ‘’There’ll be happiness after you, But there was happiness because of you too’’ and I think these lyrics remind us that, sometimes we are so caught up in appreciating the past, we forget to get excited about the future. However, I think it is so important that when you are in distress, you show yourself grace and allow yourself to really fully feel all your emotions. It is so confusing and all consuming sometimes and that is okay. We are just humans trying to navigate our way through life; no one actually has a clue what to do. Nonetheless, remembering that because you have found yourself alone it does not mean that you are lonely. There is so much life ahead of you, so many more experiences, places to see and people to meet- and that is how I find comfort in my solitude this festive season.