Everyone—from my 68-year-old Gram to my 19-year-old best friend—warned me that it would be hard. I kind of shook it off and ended the conversations as quickly as possible. I always responded, “I’m not worried about it, we’ll be fine.” But after one month of being away from my boyfriend, I can testify that this is hard, really hard. We spent every single day together since I returned from school last semester. 115 beautiful days of summer. Then autumn came and I left and he stayed.
Here are five things that I know we’ve all experienced as girls in love without our better halves.
1. You choose to stay in and FaceTime with him instead of going out with the girls.
Yes, it’s Friday night. Yes, you’re 18 and you want to have fun. But…NO, you’re not going to go out! It’s crazy but at a certain point those nights that you may or may not remember aren’t as important anymore. You’d rather snuggle up in bed, open your laptop, and talk to your person until you both fall asleep behind the screens.
2. You’re constantly worried about where he is and what he’s doing.
It’s not that you don’t trust him. It’s that you don’t trust other people. It’s okay to worry. Just remember to have faith in his loyalty and breathe. Do not forget to breathe.
3. You have pictures of him everywhere. The wall, your desk, your computer, and both backgrounds on your phone.
Your dorm room looks like a shrine to your boyfriend. You’re not insane! You just love seeing his face as much as you can throughout the day. You need your daily dose of him, even if that means staring at the photos on your desk (while you should be studying) or gazing at the background of your phone.
4. You pick fights for no reason at all.
Stuff that never bothered you before is going to start to bother you. Guaranteed. It’s not always because you’re changing or you’re falling out of love, sometimes it can be just because you’re angry. Not angry with your partner, but angry at the situation you’re stuck in. You’re hundreds, sometimes thousands, miles away. You don’t interact the same way because you can’t. I mean c’mon, you can’t even touch him.
5. You say “I love you” at least ten times a day.
You can never say “I love you” enough. Especially when you’re not lucky enough to spend every single day with the person you love. You say the three magic words when you wake up in the morning, when he sends you a cute snap, when you hear a song that makes you think of him. It’s absolutely acceptable to tell him how much you adore him at any given time throughout the day.