Cuffing season (n): the period of time in which nearly everyone seeks to be boo’d up with someone in order to survive these cold New York winters.
For those of you who didn’t know, cuffing season is about to be in full effect. While some people may have had their head start, enjoying pre-season antics and plots, most people are still happily single until the official beginning of Cuffing Season, October 30th. Typically, cuffing season would begin the day after Halloween, because Halloween is the last day you want to be single for. However this year Halloween is on a Tuesday, so for us, college students, Halloween is (for all intents and purposes) October 28th. While couples’ costumes are adorable, it’s your last chance to be a “slutty” something, or dance with a girl dressed as a “slutty” something. Most parties are tailored to antics under the hidden facade of masks and costumes, which makes it the best way to end out single-life.
In the same way that you can be anyone who you want to be behind the walls of the internet, you can be whoever you want to be during Halloweekend. Then come Monday morning, when the hangover has cleared and you see life with a bit more clarity, you’ll start to notice that the temperatures dropped a bit. You’ll start to notice that you want someone to cuddle with because that turtleneck won’t suffice.
You want to cuff somebody.
Cuffing season begins after Halloweekend because after that time, all the following holidays are family/relationship-oriented: Thanksgiving (if you celebrate this politically incorrect holiday based on the deception of colonizers), Christmas/ Hanukkah (or the holiday of your choice), New Year’s Eve, and, finally, Valentine’s Day. After Valentine’s Day, the weather should, theoretically (thanks Climate Change) start to get warmer as spring begins. As the weather warms up,
Hopefully, you’ve been scoping out potentials at this point. 10 weeks into the semester, I hope you’ve spotted someone who’s caught your eye. Now, it’s time to get serious:
Maybe you can like a few old photos to get their attention, slide in a DM if you’re feeling bold, or maybe just get that courage to sit next to this person in class (always just ask if you can borrow a piece of paper, or a pen; it can really spark conversation if you do it right).
Let cuffing season begin!
Please be sure to leave your tips in the comments below…I sure could use some new strategies.
Gifs courtesy of Tenor GIF